Not Done Yet

“But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing” (James 1:4 HCSB).

This verse caught my attention recently, perhaps because I was reading it in a different translation than I usually use. I think I’ve typically paid more attention to verses 2-3: “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.” But it’s verse 4 that points out the end goal.

We don’t endure simply for the sake of learning endurance, but so that we may reach maturity. But here’s the rub: we aren’t the ones who get to determine when maturity has been completed. The Apostle Paul, in one of my favorite verses, states, “I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Christ Jesus” (Phil. 1:6). God not only sets the standard for perfection in our lives, but He’s also the one who will bring it about at the end of time. So long as we live in this fallen world with these broken bodies, we’ll have to keep enduring a variety of trials and struggles. And as we endure in Christ, we’re slowly being conformed to His image.

It’s possible to endure in ways that don’t lead toward maturity. Some people may be quick to tell you all that they are putting up with, but there is little evidence of the fruit of the Spirit growing in their lives. Enduring in your own strength can look like just gritting your teeth and holding on with all your might. But enduring with Christ and by the power of the Holy Spirit brings peace in the midst of the storm, humbly trusting that God will sustain you as long as necessary. That kind of calm assurance comes with the maturing process.

Now that I can’t avoid the fact that I’m middle-aged, I generally consider myself to be pretty mature in most areas of life. But I’ve also been realizing areas where I’m still relying on false narratives I learned as a child. Looking back, I can see ways that I have matured over many years, but I know I still have much to learn to be truly mature and complete.

In an episode of the Being Human podcast that I listened to this week, the comment was made that in the Christian life suffering is a feature and not a bug. We tend to think that if we could just reprogram some part of our brains then we wouldn’t have to deal with suffering, as if endurance is simply one lesson we need to learn and then we’re done with it. If our Savior endured suffering, why do we think we should be exempt? We are to follow in His steps, even when it includes suffering (1 Pet. 2:21).

Just as little children need to mature by learning that they can’t always get what they want, we too need to remember that things won’t always go our way or be easy and pleasant. This world can’t satisfy all our desires, but it makes us long for the perfect life that is yet to come. When that day comes, then we’ll be mature enough to enjoy it as God intends.

“As for [the seed that] fell among the thorns, they are those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by the cares and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature. As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience [endurance]” (Luke 8:14-15).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Run Your Race

Steve Cuss hosts the “Being Human” podcast with Christianity Today, and he’s also recently published The Expectation Gap: The Tiny, Vast Space between Our Beliefs & Experience of God. It is thought-provoking reading. In chapter 7 he addresses some of our faulty assumptions about our progress in our faith. He writes:

“ASSUMPTION: We read these Bible stories multiple times and forget that many of these experiences happened only once to a particular person. We carry the pressure to live out that one story in our lives all the time. REALITY: Seeing these stories as points in time rather than for all time can help us relax into human-sized expectation…

“ASSUMPTION: One week we need to be like Peter. The next week we need to be like Mary. It all depends on what story we are reading that week. REALITY: Peter was pretty much always like Peter. Mary was very Maryesque. You are you, and I am me. We will get further in our faith if we accept our humanity than if we always strive to be someone or something we can never be… Over time, we end up stacking all of these people with all of their unique traits and examples into one fictional super-disciple that none of us will ever be and, frankly, none of them were either.”

You’ve probably experienced something like that. We hear a sermon about Mary and Martha and we think we need to spend all our time sitting at Jesus’s feet in devotion. Yet if we all did that we’d miss a lot of meals! We think we need to be like Peter when he preached fearlessly, yet there were also a number of times he stuck his foot in his mouth and once when he needed a life vest. Each of Jesus’s followers had their ups and downs, and we are no different.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote in Discipleship:

“Scripture does not present us with a collection of Christian types to be imitated according to our own choice. Rather, in every passage it proclaims to us the one Jesus Christ. It is him alone whom I ought to hear. He is one and the same everywhere” (Reader’s edition, ch. 8).

I’m reminded of the old song “Dare to Be a Daniel.” While it is true we all need courage to stand firm in our faith, we don’t need to be another Daniel or Noah or Moses. God already used them for His purposes in their own time. (Incidentally, when I was on the last hymnal committee for my denomination, I strongly suggested that Rahab should not be included in the list of possible names to use in that song, as she was in one hymnal.)

What we need is not another Billy Graham. We simply need each believer to faithfully follow our Lord’s leading in whatever path He sets before us: pastor, teacher, missionary, spouse, parent, manager, employee, author, artist, accountant, secretary, mechanic, or any other role you may have.

This subject recurs in my writing occasionally, and that’s probably because I’ve spent so much of my life trying to be someone I’m not. God has to remind me periodically that I am exactly who He made me to be, and He never expects me to be someone else. With that I will be content (at least until the next time I get distracted).

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses [from Bible times till now], let us also lay aside every weight [and false assumptions], and sin which clings to closely, and let us [each] run with endurance the race that is set before us [not someone else’s race]” (Heb. 12:1).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Not My Strength

I Prayed and Nothing Changed is a new book by Ste Casey. Part of the book focuses on the Apostle Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 12:

“So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three time I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me” (vv. 7-9).

Casey makes the point that whatever Paul’s thorn was, it was given to him by God for the purpose of keeping him humble. It seems that the thorn (or “stake”) was specifically suited for Paul’s temperament, to keep him reliant upon God.

When we face trials and difficulties, we can often forget that God is still in control. Satan could not touch Job without God’s permission (Job 1-2), and the same is true for us. We may also forget that God uses all things for the good purpose of conforming us to the image of Christ (Rom. 8:28-29). If those truths were always solidly planted in our hearts, we’d probably find it easier to “give thanks in all circumstances, [remembering that] this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thess. 5:18).

It is hard to accept and remember that our specific trials are those that God knows will best suit His purposes in our lives. I’ve often thought “If I just had that particular problem, I could handle it easily.” That’s probably why I have to deal with different challenges instead. Successfully handling something in my own strength is only going to lead to pride. But having to rely on God to uphold me day by day makes me remember that it is His strength that is perfect, not mine.

Modern culture tells us we aren’t supposed to be weak, dependent, or (heaven forbid!) uncomfortable. But that is not how God’s kingdom operates. Casey writes:

“We learn from Paul that in the kingdom of the crucified and risen Lord, surrender is success, weakness is strength, and humility is greatness. There is no joy without pain, no victory without wounds, and no wealth without loss” (ch. 1).

When we go through seasons, or a lifetime, of struggle in some area, may we cling to the truths that 1) God is good, 2) He is fully aware of what we’re dealing with, 3) He has permitted it in our lives, and 4) He will use it for our good and His glory. Therefore, we can rest in His sustaining power and give thanks.

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand” (Is. 41:10).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Who's In?

I’ve been catching up on episodes of The Chosen, and just watched the season 4 episode “The Last Sign.” In that episode in particular, there are various conversations between the disciples as they wonder, “Did you expect things to go this way?” Each one came with different expectations. You can almost feel sorry for Judas as he tries to push things in the way he thinks they are supposed to go, because he’s got a particular idea of what the Messiah is supposed to do. And for all the disciples, the death of Lazarus seemed like an anomaly. And then when Jesus raised him from the dead the question arose why Lazarus raised and not others they had loved and lost. I suspect we all have times when we want to say, “This isn’t what I signed up for!”

In a recent episode of the Being Human podcast, Steve Cuss interviewed Beth Moore. Towards the end he comments on the fact that she felt a strong call to ministry when she was really young, but she never imagined that she would have a ministry of trauma healing and helping those who battle mental illness. Beth says, “We would no more have signed up for the ministries He ends up calling us to than anything. And yet, when all is said and done, these have been the things that mattered most.”

Beth went on to mention the man born blind in John 9. When the disciples ask whose fault it was that the man was blind, Jesus responds, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him” (v. 3). Perhaps his whole life he’d wondered why he had to deal with this particular form of suffering. Maybe he had sought out healers in the past and been disappointed. But then Jesus came along and healed him—so that God’s work might be displayed in him. It doesn’t take long for the man to start proclaiming that Jesus is a prophet (v. 17).

What things make you wonder “Why is this part of my life?” Maybe it’s a physical problem, an emotional challenge, or relationship issues. It could be just about anything. Have you ever considered how God might use it for His glory? It may be something as simple as your testimony of God’s sustaining you through dark times. You are the only one who can share your particular testimony, and it may help someone who is experiencing trials of their own.

Sometimes in the church we may give people the impression that following Jesus makes life easy and doubt-free. I think we do a disservice to our young people especially when we don’t share the struggles we face at all stages of life, even when we are faithfully serving God. Rebecca Olson wrote in A New Normal: Learning to Thrive in Suffering:

“Your response to a shipwrecked life may draw more of the right kind of attention to God than a lifetime of smooth sailing. Your commitment to honor God even in your doubt and confusion can prove to a watching world that God is worth following... Furthermore, not only does your steadfast commitment to Christ present a compelling witness to unbelievers, but your perspective on your own suffering emboldens other believers (see 2Co 11).”

In my many miles of trail hiking and running, I’ve realized that the narrower the trail is, the more twists, turns, bumps, and roots there are to trip over. Wide trails make it easier to speed along without concerns. Jesus said the wide path is easy, but it leads to destruction. “The gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few” (Matt. 7:14). He never promised an easy life or smooth sailing for those who follow Him. But He did promise that He’d be with us through the hills and valleys and every bump and turn of the trail.

When we come to those times of wondering what in the world God is up to, and we’re tempted to say “This isn’t what I thought I was signing up for,” we can return again and again to the words of Peter, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life” (John 6:68). We probably brought some misconceptions with us when we decided to follow Jesus, and we’ve all faced detours that took us in directions we weren’t prepared to go. But in the end, there is only One who can redeem all our trials and use them for our eternal good and His glory. Why would we turn away now?

“Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope” (Rom. 5:3-4).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

What Do You Want?

In John 5 Jesus went by the Pool of Bethesda, where supposedly an angel occasionally stirred the water and the first person to enter the pool would be healed. There He encountered a man who had been an invalid for 38 years. Jesus asks him, “Do you wanted to be healed?” Some translations phrase it, “Do you want to get well?” The man responds, “Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going another steps down before me” (v. 7). I’ve heard this interpreted as the man making excuses and not really desiring healing. This reading makes Jesus’s question almost a rebuke— “Do you really want to get well, or are you just laying around?”

I’ve seen this interpretation enough times that it’s hard not to read the passage with that tone of voice. But I don’t think that’s how we ought to hear it. For one thing, Jesus immediately healed the man, and apparently didn’t heal anyone else at the pool that day. Jesus knew the what was in the hearts of those He met (John 2:25), so He certainly would have known if the man had hidden motives. Besides which, Jesus didn’t make anyone justify their worthiness to be healed, whether they came looking for help or not. None of us are worthy of God’s intervention in our lives.

Instead, I believe Jesus looked at the man with great compassion and His question was intended to let the man give voice to his helplessness and hopelessness. Who among us wouldn’t lose hope after 38 years in bed? Did he shed a tear each time he missed out on getting into the pool, or had he managed to convince himself it wasn’t such a big deal?

If you’ve dealt with any kind of recurring or unremitting suffering, the last thing you need is some kind of guilt trip like “If you really wanted to be well, you’d find a way” or “If you had enough faith you’d be healed.” That is one of the lies of the prosperity gospel and groups like the Christian Scientists. In contrast, J. C. Ryle wrote:

“Affliction is one of God’s medicines. By it He often teaches lessons which would be learned in no other way. By it He often draws souls away from sin and the world, which would otherwise have perished everlastingly. Health is a great blessing, but sanctified disease is a greater. Prosperity and worldly comfort are what all naturally desire; but losses and crosses are far better for us, if they lead us to Christ. Thousands at the last day, will testify with David, and the nobleman before us, ‘It is good for me that I have been afflicted.’ (Psalms 119:71).”

If we are completely comfortable and content with this life, we are likely not longing for the new life to come. And if we are not eagerly awaiting the blessed hope of Jesus’s return, we probably aren’t focused on living as citizens of His kingdom or sharing the good news that this world is not the goal or end of the story. Affliction can remind us where our priorities ought to be. A few decades of suffering might seem interminable now, but one day we’ll look back and realize that was nothing compared to the “surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus our Lord” (Phil. 3:8).

“For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal” (2 Cor. 4:17-18).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

You're Welcome

I had a conversation this week with someone about the culture in some churches that unintentionally build barriers to keep out anyone who does not fit a particular stereotype. It is often said that Sunday morning is the most segregated time of the week, not just racially, but in many other ways as well. Suits vs. jeans? Ties vs. tattoos? Unfamiliar with the liturgy? Wrong Bible translation? We wouldn’t (I hope!) tell them they can’t come in the building, but we may not go out of our way to make others feel loved and welcomed. I heard somewhere recently that most churches think they are more welcoming than they are perceived by newcomers.

After spending more than 5 hours at the DMV last week and observing the variety of people waiting, I spent some time thinking about that interesting gathering. I kind of wished I could get to know a couple of the people better, but wondered if they would feel as comfortable talking about real life at a church gathering as they did with strangers at the DMV.

In the latest episode of the You’re Not Crazy podcast, Sam Allberry and Ray Ortlund were talking about Romans 14-15. These chapters deal with church conflict and disagreements about what is acceptable. This section of Scripture includes “Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God” (Rom. 15:7). Sam made the comment, “If I don’t welcome someone God has welcomed, what I’m saying is, I know better than God. I’ve got better standards than Him.”

When Jesus was talking about the final judgment, He indicated that some would be told, “I was a stranger and you did not welcome Me, naked and you did not clothe Me, sick and in prison and you did not visit Me” (Matt. 25:43). How many people even within a local church feel like they have to keep their “true self” hidden in order to be welcome? How many secrets sit in pews on Sunday morning?

In our current culture, I suspect most of us don’t even want to talk about who we’re going to vote for in the general election, much less about what temptations we’re struggling with or the problems in our lives and families. Disagreement on even minor issues seems to lead to alienation, so who dares to talk about things that really matter?

I have my own secrets that are likely to remain secret because of things I’ve heard said by church members in the past. Although I can be the chameleon who blends into a variety of settings, I’m not convinced that some people would still welcome me if they knew all the stuff I keep hidden. Even though I am confident that God welcomes me and loves me, I’m not so sure about the attitudes of some of His people.

When Christian news sources are full of stories about church splits, lawsuits, and coverups, it doesn’t give a lot of confidence that we are “eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Eph. 4:3). It’s striking that the verses just before that say that part of walking in a manner worthy of our calling is to exercise “all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love” (vv. 1-2). Welcoming those who are unlike us requires the humility of remembering that we are not the final judge of someone’s salvation or sanctification. God delights in saving people that we may consider unlikely candidates! Even the apostles included a spectrum from fishermen to tax collectors, to persecutors of the church. If we dare to look in the mirror, we may see a bit of Pharisee in our reflection.

How is your church putting out the welcome sign? Would the stranger from the DMV feel comfortable walking in the door? Have you visited a different church recently to remember what it feels like?

“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight” (Rom. 12:16).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Indescribable

Recently I was reminded of a couple stories I heard in children’s church when I was young. The teacher liked to read from a book of Christianized stories. I don’t recall whether any instruction accompanied the stories, but what I realize now is how deficient they were in explaining the gospel. (As a side note, I shudder to think what kids might remember from my classes when I was on summer ministry teams during college.)

The first story, in brief, was that a fire swept through a barnyard and a mother hen protected her chicks by tucking them under her and sacrificing her life for theirs. The second story was of a drawbridge operator who brought his son to work one day. When he heard the horn of an approaching boat he discovered that his son was out on the gears that would raise the bridge. He had to decide whether to save his son or the people on the boat, and he chose to sacrifice his son.

Aside from the questionable choice to read such stories to children, there were definite misconceptions about how Jesus’s death on the cross came about and how we were saved through that sacrifice. A few corrective lessons come to mind.

1) The cross was no accident or last-minute decision. The Apostle Paul wrote in Ephesians 1:4 that “God chose us in [Christ] before the foundation of the world.” And in Galatians 4:4-5, “But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth His Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons.” Similarly, Peter wrote, “Concerning this salvation, the prophets who prophesied about the grace that was to be yours searched and inquired carefully, inquiring what person or time the Spirit of Christ in them was indicating when he predicted the sufferings of Christ and the subsequent glories” (1 Pet. 1:10-11). The cross was not “plan B.”

2) Jesus was not an unwilling participant. God knew from before creation that mankind would need rescued from our sinful state, and the Trinity determined the plan before we knew we needed it. Jesus knew the time of His death was coming but still prayed “Thy will be done” (Luke 22:42), and then “for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Heb. 12:2).

3) We are not innocent bystanders, “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by His grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus” (Rom. 3:23-24). We weren’t just floating through life minding our own business, but instead were (and are) actively sinning against the God who created us. And though we did nothing to deserve it, God loved us enough to make a way for us. “But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8).

4) And flowing from that verse, Jesus didn’t have to convince God to save us. Sometimes gospel presentations make it sound like Jesus loved us first, and only because Jesus gave His life does God the Father love us. Thomas McCall wrote,

“God is for us. It is not part of God that is for us—as if some divine persons or some divine attributes were opposed to me while others are for me—it is just God who is, in the impassible simplicity of the trinitarian life, radically for us. The death of Jesus does not make it possible for God to love us. The death of Jesus makes it possible for us truly to know God’s love, makes it possible for us to love God.” [See TGC’s bookreview here.]

I heard a quote from Thomas McCabe’s Faith Within Reason (which I have not yet read so I’m not sure if I’d recommend or not) that is worth pondering:

“[God] is just waiting to welcome us with joy and love. Sin doesn’t alter God’s attitude to us; it alters our attitude to him, so that we change him from the God who is simply love and nothing else into this punitive ogre... God never changes his mind about you. He is simply in love with you. What he does again and again is change your mind about him. That is why you are sorry. That is what your forgiveness is.”

It’s so easy for us to misconstrue the gospel because we try to break it down into bite-sized ideas. When we do that, we minimize the glory of the whole arc of creation, fall, redemption, and restoration. We need to remember that our metaphors are just that—tiny, flawed pictures of something magnificent and awe-inspiring.

“How deep the Father’s love for us! How vast beyond all measure, that He should give His only Son to make a wretch His treasure!” (Stuart Townend, 1995).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Eternal Misconceptions

We all have ideas and images of what we think eternal life will be like. Some are biblical, some are not, and some are interesting possibilities. I realize with a post like this there will be differing opinions, and that’s okay. (You don’t need to tell me if you disagree!) I just want to provide a little food for thought.

Earth and Heaven- Let’s just get this one off the plate first: we aren’t going to live in heaven for eternity. God is making a new heavens and new earth (Isaiah 65:17; 2 Pet. 3:13; Rev. 21:1). There would be no point in a new earth if no one is going to dwell there. We’ll finally get to enjoy what this earth would have been like if sin had never entered the picture.

Humans and Angels- We are not going to look like angels (in whatever form you may picture them). When Jesus said that in the resurrection they “are like angels in heaven” (Matt. 22:30), we can’t ignore the context. He was referring specifically to marriage and our current earthly relationships, and we shouldn’t take that metaphor beyond that context. No one will be married except as the Bride of Christ (Rev. 19:6-9). However, we may have some powers that we don’t currently have. Jesus was able to walk through closed doors after He rose from the dead (John 20:26). I like to imagine instantaneous teleportation to wherever we want to go.

Who’s Who- We will somehow recognize those we have known in this life once we have our new bodies. It’s always puzzled me when people say they think we aren’t going to remember anything about this life. Scripture talks a lot about our responsibility to one another in the Body of Christ here on earth (1 Cor. 12; Eph. 4; etc.). Why would God emphasize that so much if we were going to lose all those connections in the new world? And in fact, why would He bother with the current world at all if He’s just going to create all new beings with eternal lives?

Praise and Worship- We will not be singing songs constantly. Revelation 4:8 says the “four living creatures… never cease to say, ‘Holy, holy, holy, is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come!” Nowhere does Scripture say that humans will be doing the same. Certainly, we will have reason to give praise and thanks frequently and fervently, but there’s no reason to think it’s going to be one continuous gospel concert.

Work to Do- When God created the earth, He gave Adam and Eve work to do before sin entered the world and corrupted everything (Gen. 2:15). Sin just made the work a lot harder (Gen. 3:17-19). Work is a beneficial part of our existence, and by it we glorify God as we use the gifts He has given us. To imagine eternity as nothing but playing harps forever doesn’t sound all that appealing. Wandering around the earth seeing all the sights might be nice for a while, but I think it would get old after a couple millennia. But if we each get to participate in creative work in the areas that we are passionate about, we could glorify God and enjoy His creation in many varied ways. Some have speculated that there will still be nations, governments, and economics. Perhaps that will be the case, though we know that no one will lack what they need and there will be no conflict.

The End of Evil- Since I was raised in a conditionalist denomination, I have to include this final point, though I realize many would debate it. First Timothy 6:16 says that God “alone has immorality” and 1 Corinthians 15:42 says that “what is sown is perishable; what is raised is imperishable.” God gives eternal life to those who believe in Jesus (John 3:16), so it seems illogical that God would give eternal existence to the unsaved for the sole purpose of punishing them forever. I count myself among those who believe that hell is eternal in its results, not in its duration. There are theologians who can expand on that argument far better than I, but I’ll just note that aionion used in Matthew 25:46 and elsewhere can be translated “agelong.” And this present age will come to an end with Jesus’s return and the final judgment.

Whatever eternity is like, we are guaranteed that it will be perfect, enjoyable, and better than anything we can currently imagine.

“Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be His people, and God Himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away” (Rev. 21:3b-4).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Soft Hearts

As often happens to me, multiple information streams have converged on a unified theme this week, so this is kind of a compilation of those inputs and an extension of what I wrote last week. I was sharing this quote from C.S. Lewis with a friend:

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable” (The Four Loves).

While I was typing that, this passage from Ezekiel came to mind:

“And I will give them one heart, and a new spirit I will put within them. I will remove the heart of stone from their flesh and give them a heart of flesh, that they may walk in My statutes and keep My rules and obey them. And they shall be My people, and I will be their God” (Ezek. 11:19-20).

So my immediate thought was that the goal of the Christian life is to have increasingly soft hearts, which means we are increasingly vulnerable, not impenetrable. Jesus fleshed this out (literally and metaphorically) to say that the heart of flesh that results in obedience is revealed by our love:

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind... You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets” (Matt. 22:37-40). “By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35).

And while I was pondering that, I listened to the latest sermon podcast from Immanuel Nashville, where Sam Allberry was preaching on Romans 15:7: “Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God.” He commented:

“What makes the church different isn’t that we’re committed to meeting together—lots of people are committed to meeting together. What is meant to be different is that there’s meant to be a uniqueness to the way we are with each other—for the glory of God... The word Paul is using for ‘welcome’ in the original text is a strong word. Other translations translate ‘Accept one another as Christ has accepted you.’ But ‘acceptance’ sounds like merely tolerating. We’re not to tolerate each other, because Christ hasn’t merely tolerated us. He’s welcomed us. So the kind of welcome Paul is speaking of here is a welcome of deep belonging, because Christ, through His death on the cross for us, has pulled us deep into His heart. That is what it means for Him to welcome us.”

He went on to illustrate what that looks like from various “one another” passages in the New Testament. I think many churches have settled for a rather anemic view of community and fellowship. I’ve heard somewhere that most churches think they are more welcoming of newcomers than they really are. And even people who have been in the church for years may not really be known by the people in the next pew. As Allberry noted, these days everyone needs encouragement, yet we assume that everyone else is fine because we never get close enough to find out. Are we truly welcoming people into the depths of our hearts, or are we just meeting together once or twice a week?

“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near” (Heb. 10:24-25).

***

Related resource:

This was a thought-provoking article on the difficulty of finding community:

https://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2024/july-august/confessions-loner-community-loneliness.html

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Light and Life

The BBC recently posted this video about an Australian weather caster’s on-air panic attack. I appreciate that they used this as an opportunity to educate and encourage their viewers. Things like this make me feel a little less like a misfit in the world. I’ve been fairly open about my own experiences with anxiety and depression, largely because I’m tired of trying to live up to some arbitrary standard of mental health that is elusive at best. Lately I haven’t been able to write my blog posts as often as I used to. When I have time to do so, my brain either descends into fog or jumps and spirals down miscellaneous disconnected paths.

This week I was reading the beginning of 1 John:

“If we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:7-8).

I realize that the context is that of walking in holiness and righteousness, confessing our sin to God, and receiving His forgiveness. At the same time, I think we all know that sin is not the only thing we like to keep hidden in darkness. Church culture often tends to avoid revealing any weakness or struggle. Even in small groups it can take a long time to trust one another enough to share our heaviest burdens. (I’ve experienced the awkward silence of a group who didn’t know how to respond to me.) Yet if we can’t share those hard things, how do we ever expect to “confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed” (James 5:16)? Vulnerability has to start somewhere.

In the definition of the Greek word aletheia, Biblehub includes the following: “truth, but not merely truth as spoken; truth of idea, reality, sincerity... In ancient Greek culture, aletheia was synonymous for ‘reality’ as the opposite of illusion.” Sometimes it seems as though we are determined to keep up the illusion of competency and self-sufficiency, even though Scripture clearly says that we are meant to be dependent on God and on one another (2 Cor. 3:5-6, 9:8, 12:9, Gal. 6:2, et al).

Younger generations are more likely to value authenticity, though for many that has come to mean “Affirm me in my sinful state.” That is not the goal of Christian fellowship. We are to share our burdens, struggles, temptations, and sin in order to be lifted up, cleansed, and enabled to love and serve God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. Certainly there are times when confidentiality is necessary, and some people cannot be trusted with personal information, but in general the Church should be a place where it is safe to admit our deepest needs and where we can pray for more than just physical problems.

I used to think that Proverbs 4:23, “Above all else, guard your heart” (NIV), meant to not let anyone get close enough to know what was going on inside. It’s taken me a long time to realize that guarding your heart isn’t done by keeping everyone at a distance, but by allowing trustworthy people close enough to see the wounds and struggles so they can be a source of healing and hope.

Jesus said that not only is He the Light of the world (John 8:12), but that we are too (Matt. 5:14). We have the privilege and responsibility of shining the light of His truth into all the dark spots that keep us from loving God and loving one another as we should. His light shining through us brings life to that which is dead and dying inside.

“Whoever follows Me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life” (John 8:12b).

***

Related resource: Why the American Church Can’t Fix Loneliness by Russell Moore

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Untangled

There is a lot of talk these days about “deconstructing faith,” which usually is interpreted to mean throwing out Christianity entirely, or at least divorcing it from any relationship to the Church (as if that were truly possible). I recently read Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear, by Jinger Duggar Vuolo. I like her terminology of disentangling faith—separating the manmade rules and ideas from what Scripture actually teaches. I think all of us need to do that to some extent.

I grew up in churches of various denominations since we moved frequently, although my parents always claimed the denomination of their youth. I can remember hearing my dad explain Advent Christian distinctives to the pastors of whatever churches we attended, so much so that I knew those distinctives better than I knew the gospel. I don’t recall much preaching or teaching about grace or our identity in Christ. It wasn’t until I was in seminary that I realized that most of the denominations we had been involved with were pretty legalistic. All I remember hearing is what we were supposed to do or not do to be good Christians, and it was certainly implied that we had to be careful lest God reject us. I’ve written before about the fear that I was disappointing God, and when I expressed that fear in college I was not given any kind of reassurance that God knew all that and loved me anyway.

I definitely needed to disentangle what I had been taught from what I now know to be true. Sometimes I had someone to disciple me, but often I had to make sense of things on my own. I’ve been blessed to find a number of authors and speakers who present the Word of God with clarity, and I’ve spent a lot of time in Scripture as well. During a period of church turmoil it would have been easy, and it was tempting, to turn my back on the establishment. But after wrestling with God, I knew that wasn’t really an option, and I’ve never looked back.

One of the tangles we find ourselves in is that we live in a world of celebrity pastors and instant news. So every moral failure or incorrect statement gets magnified, and not only creates confusion and problems for their churches but also for all their other followers. We can’t let our own faith be corrupted or even destroyed by the failures and deception of men. There is only one Man who lived a perfect life, and He is the one we need to focus on and follow. Every other person will sin, fail, and speak falsehood at times, because none of us have perfect knowledge and discernment. Even the Apostle Paul said, “I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing” (Rom. 7:18b-19).

Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote in Discipleship in his chapter on the Sermon on the Mount (ch 6):

“The disciples should not think that they could simply flee from the world and stay safely in the small group on the narrow path. False prophets will come among them, and the confusion will make their isolation even greater... A prophet or preacher stands there, a Christian by appearances, words, and deeds. But internally dark motives are driving him to us... To what should we hold fast, if we hear how the word of Jesus draws the separation between the community and the world, and then within the community until the last judgment? If nothing is left to us, neither our confession nor obedience? Then the only thing left is his word: I have known you. This is his everlasting word, his everlasting call.”

Jesus Christ is the One we look to as our Savior and Lord, the One who defines truth and knows those who are His own. But we are to follow our Shepherd together as the Body of Christ, not independently and in isolation.

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me” (John 10:27).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Just Me

When you imagine the Apostle Paul, what sort of man do you see? A bold, fiery evangelist, unconcerned about what people think of him and unafraid of confronting sin? Certainly there are some examples of that in Scripture, such as when he opposed Peter for acting hypocritically (Gal. 2:11-14), and when Elymas the magician was deceiving the proconsul (Acts 13:6-12). However, there are other verses that paint a different picture:

“And I was with you in weakness and in fear and much trembling” (1 Cor. 2:3).

“I, Paul, myself entreat you, by the meekness and gentleness of Christ—I who am humble when face to face with you, but bold toward you when I am away!” (2 Cor. 10:1).

“[Pray] also for me, that words may be given to me in opening my mouth boldly to proclaim the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains, that I may declare it boldly, as I ought to speak” (Eph. 6:19-20).

If those were the only descriptions you had of Paul, you might imagine him as a rather timid fellow, perhaps the way Timothy is often pictured. It can be easy to overlook a few verses when they don’t fit with our preconceived ideas. MacLaren’s Exposition of Acts 7 says this about Paul’s conversion experience:

“An overwhelming conviction flooded his soul that He whom he had taken to be an impostor, richly deserving the Cross that He endured, was living in glory, and was revealing Himself to Saul then and there. That truth crumbled his whole past into nothing; and he stood there trembling and astonished, like a man the ruins of whose house have fallen about his ears.”

No doubt Paul ended up questioning all that he thought was true, including how he needed to relate to these Christians he had despised. What he had previously considered as strengths were now his weaknesses (Phil 3:3-11).

Even those of us who have grown up in church may trust in the wrong things. We may rely on our natural abilities rather than God’s strength. Or we may assume that we are supposed to fit a particular stereotype if we are “good Christians” fulfilling God’s commands to evangelize and make disciples. If that were the case, God sure wasted a lot of creativity on humanity.

As some have said, we are uniquely created on purpose and for a purpose. There are a lot of people in the world and in church that I don’t understand, and I can’t imagine what it’s like to live their lives. They are probably just as baffled by me. We have different personalities, interests, abilities, and communication styles. God can use all of those things for His purposes if we submit them to His lordship. If we don’t, they are likely to trip us up and may cause us to glorify ourselves rather than God.

I’m probably more like Timothy than Paul, but mostly I’m just me, as God created me, redeemed me, and is sanctifying me. And that’s okay.

“If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness” (2 Cor. 11:30).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Amidst the Unknown

In his book Seasons of Sorrow, Tim Challies shares meditations on the death of his only son at the age of 20. He comments,

“God is working out his good will, not despite dark days, difficult trials, and broken hearts, but through them. Such circumstances are the raw material he uses to form and shape his good plans, his perfect purposes... The history of God’s work is this world is full of such ‘afterwards.’ Joseph had to be for many years a slave before he could be a ruler and declare to his brothers, ‘God sent me before you to preserve life’ and ‘you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good.’ Moses’s mother had to set him afloat on the river and release him to be raised by a foreign princess before she knew her son would lead the great exodus.”

I would add a few details to that: Jacob lived for many years believing that his beloved son Joseph was dead, and only in his old age did he find out that Joseph was alive and well in Egypt. Moses’s mother is not mentioned in Scripture after her baby was weaned and adopted into the royal family. There is no evidence that she was even alive when Moses returned to lead the people out of Egypt. She likely died knowing only that her son had fled the palace.

There was also Job, afflicted in almost every conceivable way, and trying to figure out what God was up to in his life. It appears that God never did answer why it all happened, and only reminded Job that He was still sovereign. In addition, there were many generations of Israelites in the Promised Land awaiting the Messiah and wondering when God was going to fulfill His promises.

Jesus told His disciples, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand” (John 13:7). Eleven of them found out the truth a few days later and were emboldened to preach the gospel to a hostile world. But one died in his despair, not believing that he could ever be forgiven for betraying his Lord.

There is much in this life that we cannot know or understand now. Some of our questions may be answered in short order, and some may not be answered even in eternity. I truly believe that God is working all things together for good for His children, but many times I wish I knew exactly what good He is planning to bring about and what His schedule is. His good purposes will probably look somewhat different in each of us. I don’t know why Tim Challies lost his son at the beginning of a life of faithful ministry, but I am glad to read his thoughts as he has processed this with God at his side. I don’t know what good comes through having a parent with Alzheimer’s (though I’m learning). I don’t know why a teenager gets cancer or a young man rebels. As Challies notes, “Our lives are not our own. They never are. They never were. ‘In his hand is the life of every living thing and the breath of all mankind’” (Job 12:10).

I can only speak for myself, but I am (ever so slowly) learning a few good things that come out of a lifetime of recurring depression. I am more conscious of my weakness and my need for God’s strength to keep carrying me through the valleys. I am more honest and more likely to reach out to others for help and encouragement. I am more faithful in praying for others I know who are struggling in various ways. In these small ways I am becoming more like Christ and, hopefully, contributing to the needs of His Body here on earth. I don’t know what the future holds, and I can’t even begin to fathom the “eternal weight of glory” (2 Cor. 4:17) that is to come. But from where I am today, would I erase depression from my life story if I could? No. God has used it to make me who I am now and who I will be in the future, and I trust that His plan is best even if I can’t fully understand it.

“These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth” (Heb. 11:13).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Waiting and Hoping

When I saw the latest episode title on one of the podcasts I follow, I knew I had to listen right away: Hope + Help for Waiting on God. Mark Vroegop’s new book, Waiting Isn’t a Waste, is one I’ll get as soon as it is released. I know I’m not good at waiting, and it’s something I’ve been wrestling with recently. A particular arena of uncertainty about the future had me anxiously awaiting a resolution. I searched for ways around the waiting without success. So some of Vroegop’s comments in the podcast hit home (and perhaps stepped on my toes a bit).

He notes that in Scripture the Hebrew word that is often translated as waiting is synonymous with hope. (Some time back I had noticed the same of the Spanish word esperar.*) Yet so often we wait without hope. Which brings me to the next point I noted in the podcast. When we are waiting, we need to refocus our attention away from thing that is causing the gap in our knowledge and think instead on what we know about God. Here are a few of the truths that I’ve been returning to in the past several days:

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose… to be conformed to the image of His Son…” (Rom. 8:28-29).

“I know that the Lord will maintain the cause of the afflicted, and will execute justice for the needy. Surely the righteous shall give thanks to Your name; the upright shall dwell in Your presence” (Psalm 140:12-13).

“I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Heb. 13:5b).

When I’m consumed with anxiety, I start thinking “yeah, but...” I know God is at work, but His ways are not my ways. I know He hears my prayers, but He doesn’t always answer them the way I want or expect. I know He will work all things for good, but I don’t know how long it will take. As C.S. Lewis wrote, “We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be” (Letters, 29 April 1959).

Vroegop also touches on the subject of evaluating our expectations. I want to control my world and the people in it, and dashed expectations hurt. It’s hard to remember and accept that God is working things for good when I can’t understand how He’s doing it or what good may come of it. I’m only now seeing the good that has come out of some things that happened years ago.

As I was anxiously waiting, I tried to think about what was actually under my control, which was not much. I could pray boldly and persistently (and I did), and I invited others to pray with me (which I don’t often do). Aside from that, I simply tried to trust God’s promises and His character more fully, and endeavored to “rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances” (1 Thess. 5:16-17).

It turned out that my anxiety-producing lack of knowledge was settled earlier than I expected and in the way that I desired. In reality, the answer was already decided long before I even had reason for anxiety. It was only my own knowledge of the circumstances that needed to be brought up to speed, which required an appointment with the one person who could tell me. Even if that hadn’t been the case, God already knew the answer before I started praying. But in His divine providence, He allowed the testing of my faith in order to make me depend on Him more fully, as well as to remind me that I am connected to people in His Body who are more than willing to pray for me. I wouldn’t have paid attention to a podcast about waiting if I had not had to wait. And I wouldn’t have heard or heeded the reminder that what we know to be true of God is always where we need to focus our attention.

Bruce Martin wrote in Desperate for Hope, “The more we reflect on the greatness of God, the more our perspective on the situation changes. We’re reminded that God is with us and he’s always up to something. We just can’t see it yet” (73).

“But they who wait for [NIV “hope in”] the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint” (Isaiah 40:31).

*Quiero esperar con esperanza!

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Encouraging Words

As we near the end of Mental Health Awareness Month, I thought I’d share a selection of resources that I’ve found helpful at different times in life, some of which I’ve quoted in prior blog posts. I may not agree with everything these authors and speakers share, but have generally found them to be helpful and encouraging.

Books

Glimmers of Grace, Kathryn Butler

What Does Depression Mean for My Faith? Kathryn Butler

Not Quite Fine: Mental Health, Faith, and Showing Up for One Another, Carlene Hill Byron

Midnight Mercies: Walking with God through Depression in Motherhood, Christine Chappell

Pursuing Health in an Anxious Age, Bob Cutillo

Spurgeon’s Sorrows: Realistic Hope for those who Suffer from Depression, Zack Eswine

Darkness Is My Only Companion: A Christian Response to Mental Illness, Kathryn Greene-McCreight

Untangling Emotions, Alasdair Groves and Winston Smith

Companions in the Darkness, Diana Gruver

Blessed Are the Misfits, Brant Hansen

Embodied Hope: A Theological Meditation on Pain and Suffering, Kelly Kapic

You’re Only Human: How Your Limits Reflect God’s Design and Why That’s Good News, Kelly Kapic

Walking with God through Pain and Suffering, Tim Keller

When Darkness Seems My Closest Friend, Mark Meynell

A Christian’s Guide to Mental Illness, David Murray and Tom Karel, Jr.

Christians Get Depressed Too, David Murray

Sacred Endurance: Finding Grace and Strength for a Lasting Faith, Trillia Newbell

I Trust When Dark My Road, Todd Peperkorn (free pdf download!)

God’s Grace in Your Suffering, David Powlison

The Scars That Have Shaped Me: How God Meets Us in Suffering, Vaneetha Risner

Depression: Looking Up from the Stubborn Darkness, Ed Welch

Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy, Mark Vroegop

CSB Life Counsel Bible- contains many of the New Growth Press minibook series

Blogs

CCEF Blog

Penetrating the Darkness, Terry Powell

Podcasts

Hope + Help Podcast, Christine Chappell

CCEF Podcast, Alasdair Groves

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Do It Anyway

More than a year ago I collected the following quotes as potential fodder for my blog, though little explanation is required.

“We live in what one writer has called the ‘age of sensation.’ We think that if we don’t feel something there can be no authenticity in doing it. But the wisdom of God says something different: that we can act ourselves into a new way of feeling much quicker than we can feel ourselves into a new way of acting. Worship is an act that develops feelings for God, not a feeling for God that is expressed in an act of worship. When we obey the command to praise God in worship, our deep, essential need to be in relationships with God is nurtured” (Eugene Peterson, A Long Obedience in the Same Direction, 48).

“How does one feel thankful? ...It seems to be something which disappears or becomes a mere word the moment one recognizes one ought to be feeling it. I always tell people not to bother about ‘feelings’ in their prayers, and above all never to try to feel, but I’m a bit puzzled about Gratitude: for if it is not a feeling, what is it? A funny thing how merely formulating a question awakes the conscience! ...Act your gratitude and let feelings look after themselves” (C.S. Lewis, Yours, Jack, 95).

“...we have no power to make ourselves love God. The only way is absolute obedience to Him, total surrender. He will give us the ‘feeling’ if He pleases. But both when He does and when He does not, we shall gradually learn that feeling is not the important thing. There is something in us deeper than feeling, deeper even than conscious will. It is rather being. When we are quite empty of self we shall be filled with Him” (Ibid. 101).

“Feelings come and go, and when they come a good use can be made of them: they cannot be our regular spiritual diet” (C.S. Lewis, The World’s Last Night, 109).

These days we might hear someone say, “I don’t feel like going to church... reading my Bible... praying.” But could you benefit from doing it anyway? “I don’t feel like praising God?” But isn’t He worthy of praise at all times? There are a lot of things in life that we do whether we feel like it or not. And although faith isn’t a “to do” list, there are times when we simply have to trust that doing what God has instructed in His Word will be good for us in the end.

The spiritual disciplines have gotten lost in some Christian traditions, because they are confused with works-based salvation. Their value lies not in saving us, but in drawing our attention back to the One who did save us and gives purpose to our existence. Let us therefore draw near to God in worship and gratitude.

“Rejoice always, praying without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thess. 5:16-18).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Forgiven Indeed

In his book The Yellow Leaves, Frederick Buechner related the following:

“Frank Tracy Griswold, presiding bishop of the Episcopal Church... told me that once when he was taking a shower, he distinctly heard a voice from somewhere saying, ‘Why do you take your sins so much more seriously than I do?’ His first reaction, he said, was to burst into laughter. His second was to burst into tears.”

I had mixed feelings of my own when I read that. On one hand, sin is extremely serious. The smallest of offenses against the perfect, holy God is worthy of the death penalty, and in fact led to the death of Jesus Christ. And yet Scripture proclaims,

“And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with Him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This He set aside, nailing it to the cross” (Col. 2:13-14).

For those who follow Christ, all our sins, past, present, and future, were nailed to the cross and removed “as far as the east is from the west” (Psalm 103:12). So while each time that we sin is a reminder of the penalty we owed, it is also an occasion for God’s grace to abound to us over and over again.

“But the free gift is not like the trespass. For if many died through one man’s trespass, much more have the grace of God and the free gift by the grace of that one man Jesus Christ abounded for many... Where sin increased, grace abounded all the more” (Rom. 5:15, 20).

Those who are faithful Christians don’t take sin lightly, or think of it as “no big deal.” We don’t “continue in sin that grace may abound” (Rom. 6:1). But I believe that many of us hold onto the feelings of guilt and shame long after we’ve confessed our sins to God. I heard myself saying recently, “I know God doesn’t hold it against me, but I hold it against myself.” At times like that, God may truly ask us, “Why do you take your sins so much more seriously than I do?” If He has forgiven those sins, who am I to stand in judgment against those same sins? If His grace has “abounded all the more,” who am I to reject it for myself?

Of course, just knowing that truth doesn’t mean we always take it to heart. We have an accuser to loves to remind us of all the times and ways we have failed to love God and others. He wants to keep us wallowing in the mud so that we’re too distracted to serve God. And if we think of ourselves foremost as sinners, we may forget that we have the ability to say no to sin because of God’s grace.

From the vantage point of the cross, my sins are no longer on my record or my shoulders. Jesus’ shoulders bore the weight so mine do not need to. His hands were nailed to my sin, so my hands are now free.

Lord, help us to see ourselves as the new creations You have made us to be. Where we are forgiven, help us to forgive ourselves. Where we are tempted, guard us against the lies and lures of the world, the flesh, and the devil.

“The Lord passed before [Moses] and proclaimed, ‘The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness’” (Ex. 34:6).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Yes, Mental Illness Exists

A prominent Christian leader is reported to have said recently that “There is no such thing as mental illness.” While I agree that we need to normalize the experience of suffering, mourning, and anxiety within the church, his statement is likely to have the opposite effect, which makes me sad. Those of us who take medication for various mental illnesses don’t need added shame for not being able to cope without them. We feel plenty of shame already, because it feels like everyone else has stronger faith and better coping skills than we do. Even if science can’t explain why, some medications do help some people. They don’t necessarily fix the problems, but they reduce the symptoms enough that we can carry on with daily life and, hopefully, get good, godly counsel as well. As Kathryn Butler notes in a new article from TGC:

“The first stop when seeking help for depression is your primary doctor’s office, but it shouldn’t be the last. While a doctor determines whether an antidepressant will help, it’s critically important to couple any medication with counseling.”

However, godly counseling can be hard to find as well, particularly if one is relying on the local church to provide it. Most pastors and church leaders don’t have the training or the time to provide the deep, long-term counseling that many of their church members need. And depending on their theology, they may create more problems than they solve. I’ve been blessed to find a Christian counselor within the medical system, but available appointments are few. For those with more intensive needs, it can be expensive to get the necessary help.

In the CT 2024 Pastors Special Issue, Jeannie Whitlock writes of Recapturing Wonder in a Cynical Age:

“Many of us haven’t even processed everything we have lost, pushed by a culture that urges us to quickly move on. But as Christian Wiman warns, unaddressed grief will make itself known, showing up in ‘every kind of crying but the kind you can see.’ Our bodies keep the score. Bottled sorrow can metastasize into physical ailments, unexplained fatigue, heartache, weakened immunity, or constant irritation. Yet, many American Christians are terrible at grieving.”

Often times it seems as though the church has lost the art of lament, in part because we’ve forgotten how to bear one another’s burdens. We’ve accepted superficial relationships as “good enough.” If the church were better at all the “one another” commands, there probably would be less need for medications and outside counseling services, but those will never completely go away in this lifetime. We live in a broken world, where our bodies and minds are impacted by sickness, suffering, and sin (our own and others’). Telling people “there’s no such thing as mental illness” is somewhere on the spectrum between “Just deal with it” and “If you just have enough faith you will be healed,” neither of which is helpful or encouraging.

In the midst of writing this, a severe storm moved through the area, providing me with an analogy. The property next to my house was recently clear-cut for building an electrical substation. When the storm came, a large pine tree that was left at the edge of the woods fell across the power lines. Because it no longer had neighboring trees on three sides, it was more susceptible to the wind than it had been before. Likewise, many Christians, and especially those struggling with mental illness, feel like they are on the fringe of church life with little support and protection from the storms of life. We need aid in whatever forms we can get it.

Perhaps we all need the reminder that God “comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer” (2 Cor. 1:4-6).

“Therefore encourage one another with these words” (1 Thess. 4:18).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Image courtesy of SAMHSA.gov. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Remember This

Having grown up in a fairly “low church” tradition, I’ve never given much consideration to the repetition of rote prayers and sentences. After reading a variety of authors who have referred to the Book of Common Prayer, I started getting more interested. Then recently I started listening occasionally to The Daily Office Podcast from the Anglican Church in North America 2019 Book of Common Prayer. Although they occasionally include readings from apocryphal books that I would not normally read, I’ve grown to appreciate the practice.

In the past, I would have been concerned that repetition of something like the Lord’s Prayer might become rote and mindless. However, if you think about all the other things that we repeat frequently and mindlessly, we could probably all use some regular infusions of truth into our thought processes. For example, there are certain TV series that I’ve watched so many times I can quote the dialog from memory. And there are plenty of negative thoughts that I rehearse more often than is wise. So it can be helpful to have biblical truths embedded in memory to bring to mind at such times.

Over and over in Scripture we are urged to remember what God has said and done:

“Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy… For in six days the Lord made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy” (Ex. 20:8, 11).

“And you shall remember the whole way that the Lord your God has led you” (Deut. 8:2).

“Remember the wondrous works that He has done, His miracles, and the judgments He uttered” (Psalm 105:5).

“Remember this and stand firm, recall it to mind, you transgressors, remember the former things of old; for I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like Me” (Isaiah 46:8-9).

“I have said all these things to you to keep you from falling away… I have said these things to you, that when their hour comes you may remember that I told them to you” (John 16:1, 4).

We will remember things that we’ve heard repeatedly, so the only question is what those words are going to be. Will it be TV shows and secular media, or will it be Bible verses, scriptural songs, or creedal confessions that have been used in some Christian traditions for centuries? Sure, there will be times when we repeat words without thinking about them, because we’re simply human. But there will also be times when the words come from our hearts with praise, repentance, and affirmation of what we know to be true.

Let us consider how to fill our minds with the things we really need to remember.

“My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food, and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips, when I remember You upon my bed, and meditate on You in the watches of the night” (Psalm 63:5-6).

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Related resources: 

Here are two songs that are often on my mind after I’ve listened to The Daily Office Podcast:

Lord, Have Mercy by Matt Boswell, Matt Papa, Aaron Keys, and James Tealy

Creed by Rich Mullins

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

What Do You Want?

Recently I noticed that there are two recorded times when Jesus asked someone “What do you want Me to do for you?” Both occur in Mark 10 (as well as the parallel passage in Matthew 20). In the first instance, James and John (and their mother according to Matthew) asked to be honored in Jesus’s kingdom. In the second, blind Bartimaeus (and another blind man per Matthew) asked to recover his sight. Two entirely different motives were revealed—pride and the desire for glory vs. humility and a request for mercy. The request made by the “Sons of Thunder” made the other disciples indignant and resulted in Jesus preaching a mini-sermon on servanthood. But the request from Bartimaeus led to a commendation of his faith and the immediate granting of his appeal.

In He Is Not Ashamed, Erik Raymond writes:

“Bartimaeus couldn’t do anything for Jesus. He came as a needy man, and Jesus was ready to give. Jesus also didn’t insult him or belittle his condition. Unlike the crowd who looked down on him, Jesus built him up by honoring him. Far from being ashamed of him, Jesus publicly welcomed and dignified the man… He had no interest in personal exaltation; he just wanted mercy”

Jesus responded similarly to the Canaanite woman whose daughter was demon-oppressed in Matthew 15. She asked for mercy and was commended for her faith and her daughter was healed. Those who desire mercy will find it in Jesus.

However, we often come to God with mixed motives. What we desire may be a good thing: healing from illness, restoration of relationships, etc. But our wishes may become idols that attempt to push God off His throne. As is mentioned in this recent episode of the Hope and Help Podcast, can we honestly say, “I want to glorify God more than I want ______”? There are many things in life I would change if I had the power, and I wonder what God is doing in and through them. Yet I have to trust that His way is not only best, but also results in His ultimate glory. My wishes may bring me comfort or momentary happiness, but they may also rob God of the glory that is due to Him. (This is one reason the prosperity gospel is so twisted and unbiblical.)

We have a high priest who experienced weakness and has sympathy for the weak (Heb. 4:15). We have the Holy Spirit to help us in our weakness (Rom. 8:26). Our God will not let us be tempted beyond our ability, but provides a way of escape (1 Cor. 10:13). He gives us sufficient grace (2 Cor. 12:9). But we have to admit our weakness and rely on Him so that He is the One who is glorified and not us. His glory may be revealed through healing, or it may come through trusting Him to carry us when we know we can’t make it on our own.

God invites us to come to Him and to ask what we want, but with the understanding that what He gives us is the mercy we need, not necessarily the “fix” that we desire. Our faith has opportunity to grow when we have to trust that God’s “No” is for our ultimate good.

“Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need” (Heb. 4:16).

© 2024 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.