Let's Talk

Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age, by Sherry Turkle, is a book I would recommend to pastors, parents, and anyone who uses a smart phone or social media. Though it was written in 2015 it’s still relevant today. Following are a few quotes and thoughts on the “progress” of technology:

“This new mediated life has gotten us into trouble. Face-to-face conversation is the most human—and humanizing—thing we do. Fully present to one another, we learn to listen. It’s where we develop the capacity for empathy. It’s where we experience the joy of being heard, of being understood. And conversation advances self-reflection, the conversations with ourselves that are the cornerstone of early development and continue throughout life… But these days we find ways around conversation. We hide from each other even as we’re constantly connected to each other. For on our screens, we are tempted to present ourselves as we would like to be… online and at our leisure, it is easy to compose, edit, and improve as we revise” (3-4).

“We are being silenced by our technologies… These silences—often in the presence of our children—have led to a crisis of empathy that has diminished us at home, at work, and in public life” (9).

“Conversation implies something kinetic. It is derived from words that mean ‘to tend to each other, to lean toward each other,’ words about the activity of relationship, one’s ‘manner of conducting oneself in the world or in society; behavior, mode or course of life.’ To converse you don’t just have to perform turn taking, you have to listen to someone else, to read their body, their voice, their tone, and their silences. You bring your concern and experience to bear, and you expect the same from others” (44-45).

“To get children back to conversation—and learning the empathic skills that come from conversation—the first, crucial step is to talk with children. These days, it is often children who seem least afraid to point out that technology is too often getting in the way” (111).

 “People require eye contact for emotional stability and social fluency. A lack of eye contact is association with depression, isolation, and the development of antisocial traits such as exhibiting callousness. And the more we develop these psychological problems, the more we shy away from eye contact… If a tool gets in the way of our looking at each other, we should use it only when necessary. It shouldn’t be the first thing we turn to. One thing is certain: The tool that is handy is not always the right tool” (325).

Although it’s not written from a Christian worldview, this book made me consider what it means for us to be embodied souls made in the image of God. Our God, in Triune community, created man and said “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18 ESV). But ever since the Fall (Genesis 3) there has been division, dissension, and disruption to our relationships. God gave the Law to Moses (Exodus 20), but the condition of mankind required something more—an embodied presence. “And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen His glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14).

Physical presence is important to who we are as human beings. Jesus touched the lepers, the blind, and the lame. He looked the outcasts in the eye. John testified to “That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we looked upon and have touched with our hands, concerning the word of life” (1 John 1:1). It is impossible for us to fulfill all the “one another” commands through digital media alone.

We know these things, and yet it is all too easy for us to turn to texts, emails, or Facebook as a substitute for a real conversation with another person, and people are suffering the consequences. Children aren’t learning how to have real conversations or how to empathize with others. There’s an epidemic of loneliness among all ages. Suicide rates are increasing even when we’re the most electronically “connected” generation ever. Turkle writes that “human relationships are rich, messy, and demanding. When we clean them up with technology, we move from conversation to the efficiencies of mere connection. I fear we forget the difference” (21). Perhaps we each need to step back and evaluate where technology is leading us and reclaim what is being lost.

“Walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the body of peace” (Ephesians 4:1b-3).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

True Belief

In reading through the gospels, it has often struck me that throughout His ministry on earth Jesus healed many people, and only once did anyone question whether Jesus actually healed the person. In John 9 the Pharisees started investigating the man who was born blind. When they questioned him he said, “Never since the world began has it been heard that anyone opened the eyes of a man born blind. If this man were not from God, He could do nothing” (9:32-33 ESV). In Matthew 12, Jesus didn’t even touch a man to heal his withered arm, and yet “the Pharisees went out and conspired against Him, how to destroy Him” (14). They had no doubt that He was actually doing these things. In modern America we’re a lot more skeptical about such claims. However, belief in healing didn’t help the scribes and Pharisees one bit. They believed Jesus had the power to heal, but they thought it could not have come from God (Mark 3:22-30). Jesus reminded His disciples after His resurrection, “Have you believed because you have seen Me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed” (John 20:29).

At Christmas time we hear a lot of vaguely Christian lingo about belief in Jesus as the “reason for the season.” I wonder though what some people are wanting us to believe in. For many it seems to be just the fact of a baby who was born and laid in a manger, nothing more or less. Some may add that the baby was born of a virgin and was sent by God. Some may get so far as saying Jesus was a great teacher. But the story is incomplete if we don’t believe that He died on a cross bearing our sins (1 Corinthians 15:3), was raised again for our justification (Romans 4:25), and will come again to judge the earth (John 12:48). But even that belief is incomplete if we don’t accept Him as our Savior and follow Him as Lord. If our belief has no impact on how we live our everyday lives, it is meaningless.

In Luke 13 Jesus said, “Strive to enter through the narrow door. For many, I tell you, will seek to enter and will not be able… Then you will begin to say, ‘We ate and drank in Your presence, and You taught in our streets.’ But He will say, ‘I tell you, I do not know where you come from. Depart from Me, all you workers of evil!’” (24, 26-27). There will be those among us who say, “I came to church and heard the teachings; I took communion; I recited the Apostles’ Creed.” Those things are good, but they do not save.

The angels proclaimed to the shepherds, “For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord” (Luke 2:11). This is only good news for those who believe He is in fact the Savior and Lord. There is no promise of peace for everyone, but for “those with whom He is pleased” (Luke 2:14).

This Christmas let’s not leave Jesus in the manger or on the cross, but remember that He is now at the right hand of God, “far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come” (Ephesians 1:21).

“But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity. Amen” (2 Peter 3:18).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Unlikely Candidates

“My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory” (James 2:1 ESV).

Reading Warren Wiersbe’s commentary on James, one section stopped me in my tracks:

“[Jesus] saw the potential in the lives of sinners. In Simon, He saw a rock. In Matthew, the publican, He saw a faithful disciple who would one day write one of the four gospels. The disciples were amazed to see Jesus talking with the sinful woman at the well of Sychar, but Jesus saw in her an instrument for reaping a great harvest” (ch. 5).

I started wondering what He sees in some of the people we may tend to ignore or write off. That little boy who is so disruptive in Sunday school may one day be a pastor. That girl who doesn’t want to leave her mommy’s side may become a missionary in Africa. That young man who can’t seem to stay on the right side of the law may end up ministering to ex-cons.

Thinking about the people in my own church and denomination, there are a lot of people now in leadership positions who may once have been thought “irredeemable.” And if we’re being honest, all of us are unlikely candidates for belonging to the Body of Christ. We’re all sinners (not just in the past). We’re all broken and wounded by our own actions and the actions of others. Not one of us was saved because we’re such a great catch. God was never impressed by our credentials. But by grace He chose us and made us worthy and useful for His kingdom.

“God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong. God chose what is low and despised in the world,” (news flash—that’s all of us!) “even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God” (1 Corinthians 1:27-29).

We didn’t get here by our own abilities or ingenuity, and we can’t even guarantee we’ll be here another day. (How many of Israel’s kings fell because their pride got the best of them?) We are dependent on God for life, breath, strength, and the very ministry He has given each of us. “So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth” (1 Cor. 1:7). That reality should make us grateful and humble servants.

As I look back at my own life, I would never have planned the route that brought me to where I am today, and I’m sure many other people would say the same. I give thanks for all the twists and turns, hills and valleys, bumps and bruises that God has used to put me right here right now. And I trust He’ll do the same in the future to get me wherever He can best put me to use for His glory.

“For it is all for your sake, so that as grace extends to more and more people it may increase thanksgiving, to the glory of God” (2 Corinthians 4:15).

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© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Image © Dawn Rutan. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Is God Enough?

“Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for He has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5 ESV).

I only noticed recently that this verse ties contentment to the presence of God. He will never leave us, therefore we can be content. Paul said similar things in some of his letters:

“For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:10).

“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:11-13).

The question is, are we really content with God’s strength and God’s presence with us? We have the Creator of the universe on our side, and yet if we’re honest we often want something more or different. For some people it may be career, money, or material possessions, for others it may be a particular type of relationship. We may not even know what it is we’re looking for, but we’re plagued with discontentment.

I like to read biographies of Christians from World War II. I’ve often wondered how I would fare in similar situations, though I pray I never have to find out. It has been said that those who survived the concentration camps were the ones who held onto hope in One greater than themselves. God’s presence provided strength to survive and even to be content in the midst of the worst persecution imaginable. Would we truly know that God is sufficient when we’ve lost everything else? If we think we would be content with nothing, why are we not content with the many things we do have?

I’ve been convicted by this at times. While I don’t want a lot of stuff (and I already have more than I need), I do wish I could make people change to suit my own needs and desires. There’s a fine line between “spurring one another on to love and good deeds” (Hebrews 10:24) and getting people to do for me what I’m unwilling to do for them. I can complain about the lack of hospitality among Christians, but do I open my own home to others? I can say we need to cultivate deeper relationships, but do I really want to know what others are dealing with in their own lives? I may say God is enough, but I would prefer “God-plus.”

I believe it is possible to work for change in the world, in the church, and in our individual lives and yet to remember that if we never get what we want God is still enough. We can seek improvements in our culture and in our homes without pinning all our hopes and dreams on them. We can be more thankful for all the blessings we have if we know that only the treasures laid up in heaven will last (Luke 12:32-34). We may not have everything we want, but in Christ we have everything we need.

“Satisfy us in the morning with Your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days” (Psalm 90:14).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Small Drops

Christian news often focuses on megachurches and crusades, and there is often talk about desiring a great revival in our land. There’s nothing wrong with those things in themselves. However, I wonder if we’re overlooking the small things that God likes to use. Jesus used a boy’s small lunch (John 6:9) and He commended the widow’s small offering (Mark 12:42). He reminded His disciples that the kingdom of heaven is like a grain of mustard seed or a little leaven in the dough (Matthew 13:31-33).

Half of churches have 100 attendees or fewer, and 90% have 350 or fewer (source). Most of the work of preaching, teaching, and discipling happens on the small scale—in small churches, small groups, and one-on-one—and yet churches and denominations often seem obsessed with “bigger and better.”

Moses said “May my teaching drop as the rain, my speech distill as the dew, like gentle rain upon the tender grass, and like showers upon the herb” (Deuteronomy 32:2 ESV). Charles Spurgeon commented on this verse:

“Let us try to be a little useful if we cannot reach to great things. The small rain is a great blessing. Let us try to be useful in little things. Let us look after tender herbs; let us try to bring boys and girls to Jesus” (Following Christ, ch. 15).

God has let history unfold at His own pace, and we’re more than two millennia past the birth of Christ. “But do not overlook this one fact, beloved, that with the Lord one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day. The Lord is not slow to fulfill His promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish” (2 Peter 3:8-9). It may seem slow to us, but God is not in a hurry to bring everything to completion. He may bring a great flood of conversions or it may be a slow trickle. It is not up to us to try to orchestrate a grand finale. He simply calls us to be faithful to the task at hand.

We sometimes start to think of ourselves too highly. “I must share the gospel with one new person every week… My church must have 10% higher attendance by the end of this year… We must plant five new churches in this city in five years…” Some of us may be trying to function as if we have five talents when God has only given us one (Matthew 25:14-30). And some of us may be trying to function in roles that we just aren’t gifted for (Romans 12:3-8). None of us alone can do everything, and that’s why God placed us within the Body. If each member does their part, God will provide the harvest in His own good time.

“Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much” (Matthew 25:21b).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Marked for the Master

“I made the whole house of Israel and the whole house of Judah cling to Me, declares the Lord, that they might be for Me a people, a name, a praise, and a glory, but they would not listen” (Jeremiah 13:11b ESV).

The last few words of that verse are convicting. Because they didn’t listen, the Israelites were exiled from the Promised Land for many years. Though they were still God’s people, they were not bringing Him praise and glory through their actions, words, and worship. Interestingly, the New Testament authors use similar phrasing regarding who we are as Christians:

“[Christ] gave Himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for Himself a people for His own possession who are zealous for good works” (Titus 2:14).

“But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light” (1 Peter 2:9).

We belong to God and we bear His name. We are meant to represent Him through purity, good works, proclaiming His Word, and glorifying Him. We are to walk in His light so that we may stand out from this dark world. But are we doing any better than Judah and Israel were back in Jeremiah’s time? Do we show ourselves to be “set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work” (2 Timothy 2:20)?

Living in the Bible belt, I know a lot of nice, moral people, but the number of people who are clearly living for the glory of God is a lot lower. People can mistakenly assume that someone who is kind and decent must be Christian. We may also believe that someone who attends church functions on a regular basis is therefore a Christian, but that may not be true either. The ESV Bible titles Romans 12:9-21 “Marks of the True Christian,” but even in that list of instructions there is little that could not be imitated by non-Christians. Consider the following verses (emphasis added):

“Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love Him” (James 1:12).

“As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct” (1 Peter 1:14-15).

 “To this end we always pray for you, that our God may make you worthy of His calling and may fulfill every resolve for good and every work of faith by His power, so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in Him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ” (2 Thessalonians 1:11-12).

“But whoever keeps His word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. By this we may know that we are in Him: whoever says he abides in Him ought to walk in the same way in which He walked” (1 John 2:5-6).

Charles Spurgeon wrote in Following Christ:

“If we add to our churches by becoming worldly or by taking in people who have never been born again, or if we add to our churches by accommodating the life of the Christian to the life of the people of the world, our increase is nothing at all” (ch. 7).

I fear that there are many people sitting in church pews or listed on church rolls who have no idea what it really means to be a Christian. They may call themselves Christians, but they do not truly bear the name of Christ by living for His glory and praise. They have no desire for holiness or for the kingdom of God, but think that being a nice person is all the witness they need to give.

Let’s make sure we truly belong to Him.

“Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you? –unless indeed you fail to meet the test!” (2 Corinthians 13:5).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Original image copyright free from pixabay.com modified. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Insert Foot

The Christian news lately seems full of examples of questionable comments made by big-name pastors and leaders. (Here’s just one example.) Whether you agree with their theology or not, I have a problem with the forum and manner in which such comments have been made. In the pastoral epistles, Paul gave several instructions regarding the conduct of pastors/elders, deacons, and other leaders. Here are just a few:

• “The aim of our charge is love that issues from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith” (1 Timothy 1:5 ESV).
• “I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling” (1 Tim. 2:8).
• “Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wide, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach… Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace” (2 Tim. 3:2, 7a).
• “Set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity” (1 Tim. 4:12b).
• “Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, young women as sisters, in all purity” (1 Tim. 5:1).
• “And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness” (2 Tim. 2:24-25a).
• “Remind them… to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people” (Titus 3:1-2).

Although we all make mistakes, those in the news lately have repeatedly failed to treat other Christians with courtesy and respect, and have offered no apologies. Those who are in the public eye should realize that every word they say will be scrutinized, but every Christian should be “quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God” (James 1:19b-20).

What does it say to Christians when leaders publicly attack other Christians? 

I have no respect for you or your position… You aren’t worthy of respect… You are not my sister or brother in Christ… I don’t love you and I refuse to have a civil dialogue with you… You have no value in God’s kingdom…

What does it communicate to non-Christians? 

God may love you, but look out for everyone else… 

Why would someone want to align themselves with Christianity when the leaders who are thought to represent us are more interested in bickering over non-essentials and joking around in the “good ol’ boys” club?

Thankfully, there are a lot more Christians who are loving, kind, and gentle in their words and actions. They just aren’t the ones who make the news on a regular basis. My theology has been shaped—and even changed—by people who lovingly dialogue with me, but those who are harsh in their language only strengthen my resolve to disagree.

Gentleness and humility are perhaps the most ignored traits that Christians are supposed to exhibit. We’re far more adept at pride, dissension, and judgmental attitudes. The Apostle Paul reminded the believers in Ephesus:

“I urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the body of peace” (Ephesians 4:1-2).

If we would all heed that instruction, imagine what it would do to our witness to a broken and hurting world. It might not make the news, but such love would draw people in like never before.

   

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly… A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit” (Proverbs 15:1-2, 4).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.