24 / 6

During our regional Family Camp last week, we had a class discussing Matthew Sleeth’s book 24/6: A Prescription for Healthier, Happier Life, regarding our need for a regular Sabbath rest. It was interesting to hear the different perspectives on the feasibility of resting one day each week. Most of us in the world of employment, whether secular or church, find it hard to stop for a day each week. We spend 40+ hours in the office and the remainder of our time is spent catching up on the chores of home and family. But that was not God’s plan for us.

“The Ten Commandments were not a curse; rather, they gave freedom to those who possessed them. They defined the borders of the Hebrew world. Within those borders there was freedom—freedom under the law. We have a tendency to circumvent the intent of good laws, resulting in more rules being added. Sabbath was meant to protect the worker and to set the stage for a celebration of God. If our day of rest becomes a set of rules, then the celebration and the joy are easily subtracted” (39).

As I was thinking about our modern loss of Sabbath rest, I observed a few things from Scripture, some of which were mentioned in Sleeth’s book. God set the pattern for the Sabbath (Genesis 2:2) and reiterated it in the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20:11). He did not rest because He was tired but because He is holy. In the wilderness God sent manna only six days a week (Exodus 16:23-29). God provided for His people so that they could rest on the seventh day. God hasn’t changed. Will He not provide for us as well?

In the New Testament Jesus declared, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. So the Son of Man is lord even of the Sabbath” (Mark 2:27-28 ESV). Although Jesus ignored the Pharisaical additions to the law, He did not ignore the Sabbath. “As was His custom, He went to the synagogue on the Sabbath day” (Luke 4:16). Even many non-Christians will agree that Jesus was a good person and moral example, and yet those who are called by His name are often quick to ignore His example when it comes to the Sabbath.

But what came to mind and convicted me were a couple Scriptures from the early church:

“And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need” (Acts 2:44-45).

“He who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will supply and multiply your seed for sowing and increase the harvest of your righteousness. You will be enriched in every way to be generous in every way, which through us will produce thanksgiving to God. For the ministry of this service is not only supplying the needs of the saints but is also overflowing in many thanksgivings to God” (2 Corinthians 9:10-12).

Like most people probably do, I had always thought about these verses in terms of financial support and physical resources, but what if we expand it to include the resource of time? We each have 168 hours in every week, but how we use those hours varies tremendously from person to person. Some are frantically rushing from task to task, while others enjoy a leisurely pace. We may all be familiar with the 90/10 rule in churches and other organizations—that 90% of the work is done by 10% of the people. If Christians are all members of one body and “To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good” (1 Corinthians 12:7ff), then shouldn’t we each be contributing our fair share of time? (Note that I did not say “equally,” because each member is unique.) If I have more flexibility in my time, are there ways I can help someone else who is struggling to keep up? Conversely, if I am falling behind in my commitments, who can I ask for help? What tasks am I doing that I’m not gifted for?

I’ve talked with people who work in their church’s nursery out of a sense of obligation, not joy, and it makes them miserable. I’ve also talked to pastors whose church members get offended if they aren’t present for every life event or if they try to share the load with their deacons or elders. It seems to me that if the Body of Christ were functioning as it is supposed to, we would all be able to take a weekly Sabbath rest. We’ve fallen into the trap of believing that ministry is the job of a few paid people, that what I do outside of the church building is my own business, and that my time is my own to do with as I please. We are all ministers (2 Corinthians 5:18-20). We are to love one another (Romans 12:10-11), serve one another (Galatians 5:13-14), and bear one another’s burdens (Gal. 6:2). We are to be good stewards of the short time God has placed us on this earth, and He’s the one who told us that Sabbath rest is not only good but holy. How can we work together to make that possible for every member of our local body?

“As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace: whoever speaks, as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 4:10-11a).

“So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Brokenness, Surrender, Holiness

Following are several quotes worth pondering from Brokenness, Surrender, Holiness: A Revive Our Hearts Trilogy, by Nancy Leigh DeMoss:

“Broken men and women don’t care who finds out about their sin; they have nothing to protect and nothing to lose. They are eager for God to be vindicated. David’s response when confronted with his wrongdoing was that of a humble, broken man. And his was the heart that God honored. Again and again, God’s Word reveals that He is not as concerned about the depth or extent of the sin we commit as He is about our attitude and response when we are confronted with our sin” (52). “But once we have really been contrite and humble before God, it will not be threatening to be humble and honest with others—we have nothing to lose, no reputation to protect—because we have died. The broken person is willing to say, ‘Will you pray for me? I have a need in my life—God is dealing with me in this specific area’ ” (94).

“Because God is holy, we must be holy. And here’s the good news—because God is holy, we can be holy. If you are a child of God, the Holy God lives in you. He is the standard for your holiness, and He is the source of your holiness—He is your righteousness. He can wash your unholy heart with the blood of Jesus and make you clean—so the world will know what He is like… To be holy is our created purpose. It is our destiny. And it will be the outcome for every true child of God and for the entire body of Christ” (293-294).

“As Christians, we have not been left alone to deal with our sin. God has graciously put us into a body of believers who are called to look out for one another and to stand together against the enemies that would threaten our holiness. This family—the body of Christ—is a vital provision God has given to help us in our pursuit of holiness. This is why it is essential for every believer to be in a committed relationship to a Christ-centered local church. Many believers today think nothing of jumping from one church to another every time they find something not to their liking. In fact, a growing number of Christians don’t see the need of plugging into a local church at all. Some are disillusioned with their local church experience. They think they can have an independent relationship with God or that their spiritual needs can be met simply by plugging into the Internet. Being disconnected from the local church, for whatever reason, is a dangerous way to live. Not only do these ‘lone rangers’ miss out on the blessings of functioning within the context of the body of Christ, but like lone sheep away from the safety of the flock and the watchful care of the shepherd, they are vulnerable to predators of every sort” (344).

“We have tiptoed around Old and New Testament passages that proclaim the holiness of God, His hatred of sin, and His wrath and judgment against unrepentant sinners, preferring to consider only references to His mercy, grace, and love. We have promoted a ‘gospel’ that says it is possible to be a Christian while stubbornly refusing to address practices or behaviors we know are sinful. We have accepted the philosophy that it’s OK for Christians to look, think, act, and talk like the world” (368).

What more can be said?

“Surely that man must be in an unhealthy state of soul who can think of all that Jesus suffered, and yet cling to those sins for which that suffering was undergone. It was sin that wove the crown of thorns; it was sin that pierced our Lord’s hands and feet and side; it was sin that brought Him to Gethsemane and Calvary, to the cross and to the grave. Cold must our hearts be if we do not hate sin and labour to get rid of it, though we may have to cut off the right hand and pluck out the right eye in doing it” (J. C. Ryle, Holiness).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Replacing Darwin

This post is for my science-minded friends, though I think others may enjoy it as well. I just finished reading Replacing Darwin: The New Origin of Species, by Nathaniel T. Jeanson. (It almost makes me wish I’d continued my biology studies after college, but God had other plans.) Jeanson shares a lot of research that has been done in the years since Darwin wrote On the Origin of Species (1859), and his conclusions point strongly to a young earth model that aligns with Scripture. The following are just a few quotes to illustrate his argument.

“Like the 18th century, the scope of species diversity in Darwin’s day was a fraction of today’s variety. In 1859, the scientific community had no knowledge of the majority of species we have now documented… Since 1859, we’ve had time to reevaluate his picture—much more time than he had to propose and appraise it… Furthermore, the Internet makes information sharing faster than ever before” (ch. 1).

In 1865, “Gregor Mendel… solved the paradox of family trees… One of the first discoveries that Mendel made was the discrete nature of genetic information… Mendel’s experiments demonstrated the fact of particulate inheritance rather than blended inheritance… Together, the discovery of unit factors, of dominant and recessive traits, and of the segregation of genetic information began to define clear rules for the ways in which traits behave each generation… For reasons unknown, Darwin appears to have been unaware of Mendel’s work. Conversely, for equally unknown reasons, when Mendel died in 1884, his discoveries died with him, not to be resurrected until the turn of the century” (ch. 2).

“Prior to the 1950s, Mendel’s unit factors had been renamed genes… The origin of traits now seemed to be just a matter of understanding the origin of genes... By the late 1960s and 1970s, the first complete DNA sequences—the genomes—from various species were trickling in… In the 1960s, DNA was detected elsewhere—in a different sub-cellular compartment termed the mitochondria… When Darwin wrote On the Origin of Species, he had no knowledge of the genetic processes… No one had any idea how many DNA differences divided species. In fact, the DNA sequence of our own species wasn’t solved until 2001” (ch. 3).

“If Darwin had no knowledge of genetics, how could he write a book on the origin of species? …Fossils don’t directly record genealogical relationships… Similarly, geography doesn’t directly record inheritance… Finally, anatomy and physiology have a nonlinear relationship with DNA sequences… The problem with inductive reasoning is that there may be multiple explanations for an observation” (ch. 4).

“Over the last few years, one of the most critical genetic observations came from analysis of DNA sequences, not between species, but within species… In the parent-offspring pairs... the offspring contained DNA sequences that could not be traced to either parent… [They] didn’t just document the fact of mutation. They also measured the rate. Since the reported units of measurement from these studies were mutations per generation, these experiments naturally had implications for the timescale over which DNA differences arose… The mtDNA [mitochondrial DNA] findings contained in this chapter called into question the entire foundation of the evolutionary timescale… [The] millions-of-years paradigm rests on the assumption that rates of change have been largely constant. Yet, in the field of genetics, the assumption of constant rates of change… yields a 6,000-year timescale, not an ancient one” (ch. 7).

“Unlike mtDNA, nuclear DNA has been much more difficult to compare across species… Too few results have been obtained to see a general pattern of what precise percentage of nuclear DNA differences are preexisting, and what percentage are due to mutation… [The] results that have been obtained thus far for the YEC [Young-Earth Creationist] model suggest that the majority—if not the vast majority—of nuclear DNA differences in species were preexisting [i.e. created at a point in time]” (ch. 8).

I’ll leave you to read the details for yourself if you’re interested. (I would recommend getting the physical book so his charts can be seen correctly.) You can also check out the Institute for Creation Research and Answers in Genesis. I’ll close by saying that his arguments have gone a long way in changing my own interpretation of our origins from a generally theistic evolutionary position to a more literal reading of the Creation narrative in Scripture. To use Jeanson’s analogy, we simply do not have all the pieces of the puzzle yet and we can easily misinterpret the picture from the pieces we do have.

“Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it... Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows it very well” (Psalm 139:6, 14b).

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© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Cover photo courtesy of Amazon.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

I Surrender

In her book Brokenness, Surrender, Holiness (a compilation of three books), Nancy Leigh DeMoss writes,

“Our will was opposed to [God’s] will. We were intent on going our own independent way, and as a result, were estranged from the God of the universe. Even when the Spirit opened our eyes to recognize our rebellious condition, we may have sought a way to bring about peace apart from surrender. We did not want to continue suffering the unpleasant consequences of our resistance, but neither did we want to lay down our arms. Then the message was sent to our hearts: There can be no peace until you are willing to accept My terms—unconditional surrender.”

And yet even when we have made a decision to surrender to Christ’s lordship, we often try to take it back later. We still desire to have control over our own lives. “I’ll surrender the parts I don’t like, but this part is still mine to do with as I please!” DeMoss shared what Josef Tson identified as a “shift from the call to full surrender, to the call to commitment.”

“Christian surrender means that a person lifts his or her hands and says to God, ‘Here I am; I surrender; You take over; I belong to You; You dispose of me!’ But this is America, the country of the independent people! This is the place of ‘Nobody should command me! … I belong only to myself! A call to surrender, and even more, to full surrender, simply doesn’t go well with such people. Therefore, the preachers… hit on the word ‘commitment.’ You see, commitment means ‘I engage myself to do something for you.’ or, even lighter, ‘I promise to do something for you,’ but I remain myself and I may keep my promises or not...

“[Bible translators] did not like the term ‘bondslave’ to be applied to people. Who wants to be somebody else’s slave? Therefore, they replaced it with ‘servant.’ Again, a reflection and demand of the independent spirit! In the Greek, ‘slave’ is doulos; ‘servant’ is diakonos. In the Greek Bible one never, never diakoneo to God—one never serves God; one only douleo to God—that is, one slaves to God.”

Many people have made some commitment to God, but their absence of any meaningful participation in the Body of Christ is one indication that they never surrendered to Him. And all of us need to surrender again and again as God reveals areas in our lives that we’re still holding on to. Just today I was reminded that if I want to be conformed to the image of Christ (Romans 8:29), I must surrender my all rights over my life and my choices. I am no longer my own, for I was bought with the blood of Christ (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Therefore anything that stands in opposition to His lordship must be given over to His control. “Put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and… put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:22, 24 ESV).

Tson is correct that we in America don’t want to surrender to anyone. July 4th is known as Independence Day, but no one who belongs to Christ is truly independent. Actually, every living being is dependent on God, but Christians are the only ones who acknowledge our dependence on Him and willingly surrender to His control. Will we do so again today and tomorrow and every day to come?

“Father, I abandon myself into Your hands; do with me what You will. Whatever You may do, I thank You: I am ready for all, I accept all. Only let Your will be done in me, and in all Your creatures—I wish no more than this, O Lord” (Charles de Foucauld).

“I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).

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© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Jesus, Draw Me Close

In John chapter 6 we read of Jesus feeding more than five thousand people and then withdrawing. The next day when the crowds sought Him out again He told them:

“Truly, truly, I say to you, you are seeking Me, not because you saw signs, but because you ate your fill of the loaves… I am the Bread of Life; whoever comes to Me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in Me shall never thirst” (John 6:26, 35 ESV).

We are often like the crowds, seeking Jesus to meet our felt needs rather than for a desire to know Him deeply. Sam Allberry wrote about this passage, “The greatest gift Jesus gives us… is Jesus. He is not the means to some other, separate end. The Bread of Life is not something else, with Jesus being the one who dispenses it for us. He is the prize.” Heath Lambert wrote, “They minimized Jesus and his work by seeing him as the source of only one good thing rather than cherishing him as the fountain for all life… You should come pursuing a full-fledged relationship with this sovereign King who saves, desiring to draw close to him in every way, and not just seeking to get your problems fixed” (142).

It’s not just unbelievers or young Christians who seek Jesus for the wrong reasons. Even those of us who’ve been on this journey for a while can lose perspective. Our prayers can become a shopping list: heal this person; save that one; bless our food; and, oh yes, I could use a little bit of forgiveness and freedom from temptation too. I know I’m not the only one to fall into this pit at times. It is all too easy to go through the motions of prayer and Bible reading without actually seeking God or interacting with Him. Alistair Begg often uses this short prayer at the beginning of his sermons: “Make the book live to me, O Lord. Show me Yourself within Your Word. Show me myself and show me my Savior, and make the book live to me, for Jesus’ sake.” That might be worth adopting for personal devotional times, though that too can become a meaningless habit.

How might our lives and our churches be different if we were truly and consistently seeking a living relationship with our Heavenly Father rather than seeking the good things He can give us? It is appropriate to be thankful for forgiveness, the promise of eternal life, and the blessings of life and family. But we may start to sound like little children at Christmas saying a perfunctory “Thanks!” while racing off to play with our toys. And yet children who only get periodic packages from an absentee parent quickly learn that gifts are meaningless apart from a loving relationship.

The Apostle Paul prayed for the Ephesians:

“[That] according to the riches of His glory He may grant you to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God” (Ephesians 3:16b-19).

The blessings of His riches are for the purpose of knowing the Father’s love—knowing the One who is love. We miss out when we settle on the gifts apart from the Giver. May we not stop short of knowing the best He has to offer—Himself.

“See what kind of love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are… So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him” (1 John 3:1, 4:16).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

A Firm Foundation

A recent book, God’s Grace in Your Suffering, by David Powlison, is based on the hymn "How Firm a Foundation." This is a solidly biblical hymn from 1787 that is probably neglected in many churches, or may be sung with little thought given to the words. Much of the text comes directly from Isaiah 41:10 and 43:1-2. As I read through the book and meditated on the hymn, I have been particularly drawn to the third verse:

When through the deep waters I call you to go,
the rivers of sorrow shall not overflow;
for I will be with you, your troubles to bless,
and sanctify to you your deepest distress.

Powlison commented on this verse:

“God himself calls you into the deep waters. God sets a limit on your sorrows. God is with you, actively bringing good from your troubles. In the context of distressing events, God changes you… In other words, your significant sufferings don’t happen by accident. There’s no random chance. No purposeless misery. No bad luck. Not even (and understand this the right way) a tragedy. Tragedy means ruin, destruction, downfall, an unhappy ending with no redemption. Your life story may contain a great deal of misery and heartache along the way. But in the end, in Christ, your life story will prove to be a comedy in the original sense of the word, a story with a happy ending… Life, joy, and love get last say. High sovereignty is going somewhere… He is working so you know him, so you trust him, so you love him” (62-63).

We rarely can see God’s purposes while we’re in the midst of suffering. It is in hindsight that we start to see the good that God has brought out of difficult experiences. I’ve only recently begun to see some of the ways that God has used trouble from past decades not only to sanctify me but to open doors for me to encourage the struggling and to edify and exhort the church to protect the innocent and care for the wounded. Though the experiences in themselves were not holy, God has sanctified them for His good purposes. That doesn’t mean the struggles are any less difficult or painful, but I can learn to endure them with the hope that there is a purpose in them that will one day be revealed. The Apostle Paul’s words in Romans 8:18-39 and 2 Corinthians 1:3-11 point us to this purposeful hope in suffering:

“For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now… And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose… to be conformed to the image of His Son” (Rom. 8:22, 28, 29b ESV).

“If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we share” (2 Cor. 1:6).

In the midst of writing this post this week I listened to a podcast from The Allender Center that reminded me that when we are struggling with the difficulties and events of life it doesn’t really benefit us to keep it to ourselves or try to power through as if nothing is wrong. We need others in the Body of Christ to support and encourage us, and likewise, we need to do the same for them.

Powlison concluded his book with this thought:

“Finally, you are prepared to pose—and to mean—an almost unimaginable question: ‘Why not me? Why not this? Why not now?’ If in some way, your faith might serve as a three-watt night light in a very dark world, why not me? If your suffering shows forth the Savior of the world, why not me? If you have the privilege of filling up the sufferings of Christ? If he sanctifies to you your deepest distress? If you fear no evil? If he bears you in his arms? If your weakness demonstrates the power of God to save us from all that is wrong? If your honest struggle shows other strugglers how to land on their feet? If your life becomes a source of hope for others? Why not me? … If all that God promises only comes true, then why not me?” (116-117).

“A bruised reed He will not break, and a faintly burning wick He will not quench; He will faithfully bring forth justice… I am the Lord; I have called you in righteousness; I will take you by the hand and keep you; I will give you as a covenant for the people, a light for the nations, to open the eyes that are blind, to bring out the prisoners from the dungeon, from the prison those who sit in darkness” (Isaiah 42:3, 6-7).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Great Expectations

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us” (Hebrews 12:1 NIV).

I recently noticed a word in that verse that I hadn’t paid attention to before—“easily.” Sin easily entangles us. The Apostle Paul wrote, “For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing” (Romans 7:19 ESV emphasis added). I know from experience that temptation and sin don’t just miraculously disappear when we reach a certain point in our faith journey. If we do make some progress, we often start patting ourselves on the back—until we trip again and realize we’ve been relying on our own willpower. As Brennan Manning used to say, “God expects more failure of us than we expect from ourselves.”

Jerry Bridges wrote in The Gospel for Real Life:

“Sometimes our obedience is marked more by desire than by performance. So we have to ask ourselves: ‘Is my life characterized by an earnest desire and a sincere effort to obey God in all that He commands? What is my attitude toward God’s Law? Do I find it to be holy, just, and good? And do I delight in it in my inner being even though I find my sinful nature struggling against it?’ (See Romans 7:12, 22-23). Accompanying our sincere desire to obey God will be a heightened sensitivity to our indwelling sin. Often it is our increased awareness of sin that causes us to doubt our salvation or to give Satan an inroad into our minds to suggest that ‘a Christian wouldn’t sin like you do.’ But think about that accusation for a moment. Satan would certainly not suggest such a thought to an unbeliever.”

“We should never be afraid to examine ourselves. But when doubts do arise, the solution is not to try harder to prove to ourselves that we are believers. The solution is to flee to the cross and to the righteousness of Christ, which is our only hope. And then, having looked to Christ alone for our justification, we can look to His Spirit to enable us to deal with those areas of our lives that cause doubt. The work of the Spirit within us is as much a gift of God’s grace as is our justification and adoption as sons”

In one sense, my sin may be small compared to some of the “great sinners” in Scripture who found forgiveness. However, my sin contributed to the reason Jesus had to die on the cross, and I am just as incapable of saving myself as any other person who’s ever lived. If it were not for the cross of Christ, my “small sin” would be grounds for damnation and despair.

“But God being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved—and raised us up with Him and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus” (Ephesians 2:4-7 ESV).

As this article, “What To Do When You’ve Blown It,” quotes from Sam Allberry, “There is more forgiveness in Jesus than there is failure in us.” Yep, we blow it—repeatedly. But in Christ God offers us forgiveness repeatedly. My sin is not too big or too frequent for His forgiveness. My sanctification is not yet perfected, but neither is my temptation indicative of terminal failure or reason for hopelessness. Martin Luther wrote, “By saying ‘repent,’ our Lord and Master Jesus Christ willed that the whole of the life of believers should be repentance.”

For now we can rest in God’s lavish forgiveness, and one day we will be able to relish His perfected Kingdom, all because of His grace and mercy.

“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world” (1 Peter 5:8-9 ESV).

© 2019 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.