Eyes and Hands

I wrote the following poems around 1996 and just came across them again. They seemed appropriate for Holy Week.

Your Eyes

In my mind’s eye
I see you there,
Hanging on that rugged cross.
You don’t die like other men.
“Forgive them for they
Know now what they do.”
You lift your head,
Your eyes meeting the eyes
Of each one gathered there.
Each one turns away
Unable to bear your gaze,
And then your eyes meet mine.
Instantly I know you know.
You know my sin
Because you bear it there.
I am ashamed and
Start to turn away,
But then I remember,
“Forgive them for they
Know not what they do.”
I look back to your eyes.
You meant those words for me.
Even as you bear my sin
You ask the Father
For my forgiveness.
I meet your gaze
And I know
I am forgiven,
And I bow my head
In thanks.

 

With Open Hands

With open hands I come to You
I give You all my fears.
With open hands, release to You
The cares of all the years.

I tried to give them up before,
But held them in tight fists.
I come again to You once more
To give You all of this.

With open hands I come to You,
Hoping only to receive
The Holy Spirit, promised to
All those who will believe.

With open hands and open heart
And open life I give
To You alone, to cleanse each part
That in Your life I live.

© 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

No Slipping

“The steps of a man are established by the Lord, when He delights in his way; though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong, for the Lord upholds his hand… The law of his God is in his heart; his steps do not slip” (Psalm 37: 23-24, 31).

Oh, how often we think that our salvation and sanctification depend on our ability to hold onto God! We strive to keep the law of God and to be perfect because we fear that we’ll fall away if we aren’t extra careful. We forget that God is the one holding onto us. David and the other psalmists wrote:

Psalm 18:36- “You gave a wide place for my steps under me, and my feet did not slip.”

Psalm 66:8-9- “Bless our God… who has kept our soul among the living and has not let our feet slip.”

Psalm 17:5- “My steps have held fast to Your paths; my feet have not slipped.”

In Christ we are set securely upon the Rock. Those who belong to Him cannot be snatched from His hand (John 10:28-29). However, we need to remember that some who think they are Christians actually do not belong to Him (Matthew 7:21-23). They may agree that there is a God and that Jesus is the Savior, but they are not following Him as Lord.

If you think about it, the fear of falling away from faith is probably a good sign that you are securely in His grasp. You don’t fear losing something if it doesn’t mean anything to you. The good news for true believers is that God’s grace far exceeds our ability to sin. In the words of Dane Ortlund, “The verdict really is in: nothing can touch you. He has made you his own and will never cast you out” (Gentle and Lowly, 186).

We may sometimes feel like the psalmist, “But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly slipped. For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked” (Psalm 73:1-3). When we step back and look at God we can see that we are not the ones who are slipping, but rather the wicked are: “Truly You set them in slippery places; You make them fall to ruin” (v. 18). They are sliding toward eternal condemnation and they neither know nor care.

Though we do need to be careful that we are not deceiving ourselves, there is great peace to be found in knowing that our salvation doesn’t depend on our perfect obedience, because “we know that a person is not justified by works of the law but through faith in Jesus Christ… because by works of the law no one will be justified” (Galatians 2:16).

Therefore, let us take heart and rest in the salvation that was completed on the cross and the sanctification that we will see fulfilled at His return.

“When I thought, ‘My foot slips,’ Your steadfast love, O Lord, held me up” (Psalm 94:18).

© 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

All the Rest

In a recent podcast from Gospel Bound, the comment was made that although God designed us for work and rest, we’ve traded those for toil and leisure. Work in the Garden of Eden was a good gift from God, but because of the Fall we now have to labor to accomplish what needs to be done.

The idea of a Sabbath rest is another good gift. When it is first mentioned in Exodus, Moses says, “Tomorrow is a day of solemn rest, a holy Sabbath to the Lord… The Lord has given you the Sabbath” (16:23, 29). Both there and in the Ten Commandments it is referred to as a “Sabbath to the Lord.” However, we tend to leave the Lord out of our plans for our leisure time. We define the Sabbath more by what we’re avoiding than by what we’re seeking. We aren’t working, so we’re supposedly observing the Sabbath.

We do similar things in how we think about sin. Tim Keller, in his devotion on Psalm 36:1-4 writes:

“Lord, I confess the foolishness of my thought life. Even when I am able to avoid overt thoughts of resentment, fear, and lust, my mind still does not fix itself on the most worthy and beautiful of things, and on you. God glory in my eyes, Lord, and incline my heart to yourself” (March 11).

How might it change our lives if we were determined to seek God, not just to avoid sin? What would be different if we were observing our Sabbaths “to the Lord” and not simply ceasing from our normal labors? I don’t think we have to get legalistic about what is allowed or not allowed. If our focus is on God, His Word, and His will, then our actions will naturally follow. And if we’re filling our minds with Christ, then sinful thoughts and actions will have no place.

I confess there are often times when I want nothing more than to vegetate and forget about all the challenges and anxieties of life and work. I think God understands that. If Jesus could sleep in a boat during a storm, He certainly understands being weary. But I know there are many times when I would be better off seeking God in prayer and dwelling on Scripture, if I’d just make the mental effort to do so.

Isaiah was told to proclaim, “If you turn back your foot from the Sabbath, from doing your pleasure on My holy day, and call the Sabbath a delight… then you shall take delight in the Lord…” (58:13-14). Those verses could just as well be reversed— “If you delight yourself in the Lord, then you will not follow your own pursuits but will enjoy a Sabbath rest.”

Are we willing to test that out?

“The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. So the Son of Man is lord even of the Sabbath” (Mark 2:27-28).

“A Song for the Sabbath. It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to Your name, O Most High; to declare Your steadfast love in the morning and Your faithfulness by night” (Psalm 92:1-2).

© 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Crumbs of Manna

As I’m reading through Exodus again this spring, I started thinking about the Israelites gathering manna six days a week for the duration of their wilderness wanderings. How long did it take them each morning to pick up about two quarts of the fine flakes for each person? (Multiply that by the 600,000 men plus women and children mentioned in Exodus 12:37!) Certainly, there was grumbling about the inconvenience and lack of variety, along with groaning about aching backs.

The manna foreshadowed Jesus. “I am the Bread of Life; whoever comes to Me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in Me shall never thirst” (John 6:35). The Israelites couldn’t just stock up for a month or stop gathering the manna. They needed the daily grace of God’s provision for them. We too need God’s grace every day for forgiveness, sanctification, and maturity. Jesus taught us to pray for our “daily bread” (Matthew 6:11). We receive God’s provision through Jesus’s death on the cross and His intercession for us, as well as through Scripture, prayer, and gathering with the Body of Christ on a regular basis. We can’t just accept Christ as Savior and expect to live and grow in our faith any more than we could eat one meal and expect it to last a lifetime. The provision is there if we will make the effort to gather it.

It’s curious that Exodus reports, “They gathered [manna], some more, some less. But when they measured it with an omer, whoever gathered much had nothing left over, and whoever gathered little had no lack” (16:17-18). This is reminiscent of Jesus’s miraculous feeding of five thousand with five loaves and two fish in John 6, the act that preceded His statement that He is the Bread of Life. The crowd followed Him because they wanted to be filled without expending any effort and without understanding that Jesus wanted to give them something far better than daily sustenance.

In our consumer-oriented society, how often do we settle for a few fringe benefits of faith rather than digging deep for our daily nourishment from the Bread of Life? How many in our churches expect to be spoon fed when (or if) they show up?

Let us press on to maturity, “for everyone who lives on milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, since he is a child. But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil” (Hebrews 5:13-14). Let’s make it our constant practice to gather manna daily from God’s word and through interaction with our brothers and sisters in Christ.

“Truly, truly, I say to you, it was not Moses who gave you the bread from heaven, but My Father gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is He who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world” (John 6:32-33).

© 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

True Security

“When I felt secure, I said, ‘I will never be shaken.’ Lord, when You favored me, You made my royal mountain stand firm; but when You hid your face, I was dismayed” (Psalm 30:6-7 NIV).

How often do we let our spiritual security depend on our circumstances rather than on God? We feel “blessed and highly favored,” and therefore we believe we are secure. But when circumstances change and we can’t see God’s hand at work, we become dismayed and anxious. The whole book of Job illustrates this human tendency. Would Job ever have had reason to question God if he hadn’t lost everything?

We are prone to place our faith in what we can see instead of in God and His promises. Our prayers tend to reflect this. If all is well, we don’t pray much and we don’t seek God’s help and direction. But when life is uncertain and we realize we can’t rely on our own resources, we turn our attention back to God. Tim Keller wrote about this psalm,

“We often stroll through life, thinking everything will be fine, until suddenly it isn’t. Our unconscious or even verbalized though is ‘I’m solid. I’m on top of things. I’ve got it nailed. I’ve planned well. I’m secure.’ …But God shakes our confidence in our earthly life so that we can yearn for our heavenly life, where our joy is truly unshakable and where our wailing will be turned into dancing” (The Songs of Jesus, Feb. 24).

Wisdom says that we should seek God’s will in all things, but we often forget that step if we think we’ve got everything under control. Proverbs 16:9 says, “The heart of a man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” James wrote,

“Come now, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit’—yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, ‘If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.’ As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil” (James 4:12-16).

This has been personal for me as I’ve been considering a big decision. I’m tempted to rely on my own wisdom and preparation, trusting in my own control and provision. But I want to know God’s will and follow His path. The last thing I would want is to choose my own way and find myself shaken and dismayed because I’m relying on myself and not God.

It’s hard for us sometimes because God doesn’t always give clear directions when we want them. There may be multiple options that are equally good and honoring to God. The question is whether we are focused on God and are trusting in Him or in ourselves. If we are prayerfully seeking His will, our steps will be secure because our faith is in Him. That’s not to say that God always lays out a smooth path in front of us, but that the condition of the path doesn’t matter to us if we are walking it in God’s presence.

“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God… Fear not, for I am with you” (Isaiah 43:2-3a, 5a).

© 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Clean Hands and Pure Heart

The following quotes from Lead, by Paul David Tripp, seem all too apropos considering some of the recent news coming from Christian ministries.

“I have seen that when it comes to leaders’ struggle with sin, we tend to make unbiblical assumptions that cause us to be naïve and unprepared for battles that we will face in the life and ministry of leaders in our communities. It is not safe to assume that a seminary graduate is spiritually okay. It’s not safe to conclude that a very gifted leader is where he needs to be in his relationship with Jesus. It’s not necessarily true that a theologically insightful leader is spiritually mature. Ministry effectiveness is not to be confused with cleanness of heart. What you know about the public persona of a leader does not mean you do not need to be concerned about his private life” (181).

“Every leadership community should be clear that giftedness is not the same as spiritual maturity. Biblical literacy is not the same as spiritual maturity. We need to be clear that theological acumen is not the same as spiritual maturity. Ministry success is not the same as spiritual maturity. Popularity is not the same as spiritual maturity. Strategic insight is not the same as spiritual maturity” (196).

Revelations of ongoing, unrepentant sin make you wonder if a celebrity really was a Christian. (God alone knows.) The trust of the church has been betrayed on many occasions by many people.

None of us are completely free from temptation and sin. Jesus was the only person to live a perfect, sinless life. But by the grace of God we should be growing in obedience, humility, and integrity. When Jesus taught His disciples to pray He included, “Forgive us our debts… and lead us not into temptation” (Matt. 6:12-13). Why would He urge such prayers if in fact we are able by our own strength to avoid temptation and live free from sin? We are weak and fallible creatures, constantly in need of God’s power to sanctify us and conform us to the image of His Son.

Martin Luther, in the first sentence of his 95 Theses wrote, “When our Lord and Master Jesus Christ said, ‘Repent,’ (Matthew 4:17), he willed the entire life of believers to be one of repentance.” Yet how many of us live that out day by day? How often are we blissfully unaware of, or hardened to, our sin?

King David, the “man after God’s own heart,” wrote in several of his psalms:

“Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me! Then I shall be blameless, and innocent of great transgression” (Psalm 19:13).

“Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me! Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in You” (Psalm 25:20).

“Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit. For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me” (Psalm 32:1-4a).

“There is no soundness in my flesh because of Your indignation; there is no health in my bones because of my sin. For my iniquities have gone over my head; like a heavy burden, they are too heavy for me” (Psalm 38:3-4).

May God, by His grace, reveal our sins and bring conviction and repentance before those sins bury us too deeply in the mire. May our pride be broken before it becomes presumption. May we be quick to turn to Him for the mercy of forgiveness and the cleansing we need.

“Who shall ascend the hill of the Lord? And who shall stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to what is false and does not swear deceitfully. He will receive blessing from the Lord and righteousness from the God of his salvation” (Psalm 24:3-5).

© 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

My Shelter

“The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold” (Psalm 18:2).

In this one verse David uses eight different Hebrew words to describe God’s protection over him. The picture is one of being guarded on every side by God’s power. Why then are we so easily overcome by fear and anxiety?

When foes surround us, He is our deliverer.

When enemies attack us, we are safe in God’s fortress.

When the world seems to be falling apart, we stand securely on His rock.

When Satan throws his darts at us, we are shielded by God’s Word.

When guilt and shame threaten us, we are guarded by His salvation.

When we feel powerless, He is our stronghold.

Our security comes not from our own strength or abilities, but from the One who holds us in the palm of His hand. To be dominated by fear is to disbelieve His promises and His power. He is “the blessed and only Sovereign, the King of kings and Lord of lords” (1 Tim. 6:15), so He is able to do whatever He pleases. He is always watching— “Behold, the eye of the Lord is on those who fear Him, on those who hope in His steadfast love” (Psalm 33:18), so nothing catches Him by surprise. He delights to do good— “The Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly” (Psalm 84:11).

There are so many promises in Scripture that we can cling to if we will remember when the storms come. (I’m preaching to myself first and foremost.) We need frequent reminders to “taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!” (Psalm 34:8).

Lord, I believe—help my unbelief! “Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but [I will] trust in the name of the Lord our God” (Psalm 20:6).

“In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for You alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety” (Psalm 4:4).

 © 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV and all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.