Under Control

I’ve been reading Tony Reinke’s book 12 Ways Your Phone Is Changing You. Ironically, Facebook got knocked out of commission for several hours Monday. Perhaps God was encouraging me (and everyone else) to consider the message of the book even more seriously. My social media use tends to increase over time until I make a conscious effort to pull back, and this is one of those times.

As I was reading about the decline in reading comprehension and the growing determination to catalogue our lives in post-worthy images, I imagined how a few scenes from Jesus’s life on earth might have been different:

“Blessed are the poor in spirit… meek… merciful…” -Yeah, whatever. Keep scrolling.

“Blessed are those who are persecuted…” -Retweet!

Hey, I got 136 likes on my post! Who’s the greatest now? LOL -“The greatest among you shall be your servant.”

Who are we missing on this Zoom meeting? -Well, Andrew went fishing, Peter’s mother-in-law is sick again, and no one knows where Judas is tonight.

“One of you will betray Me.” -Wait, what did He say? I was checking my messages.

OK, so maybe we aren’t much different from the disciples. We all wrestle in varying degrees with pride, distraction, and desire for attention and approval. Smartphones and social media connections just give us a quick and easy way to do so.

Reinke writes about a theology of remembering:

“Whatever else is at play in the digital age, Christians are commanded over and over to remember. We must not lose our past and our future for moment-by-moment tweets and texts on our phones… All spiritual growth is rooted in remembering what Christ has done in me… Remembering is one of the key spiritual disciplines we must guard with vigilance amid the mind-fragmenting and past-forgetting temptations of the digital age” (187-188).

I would add to that a different sense of the word remember. We need to re-member who we are created to be as the Body of Christ. Social media is great at fragmenting us into camps that are at odds with one another over all kinds of issues. We interpret likes and follows as affirmation that we are in the “right” crowd, even as we’ve simultaneously alienated friends and neighbors that we go to church with. We essentially dismember one set of relationships that’s based on eternal principles for another set based on the illusion of superficial agreement.

“Jesus boils down the purpose and aim of our lives into two goals: treasure God with your whole being, and then pour out your God-centered joy in love for others. On these two commands all other smartphone laws depend: (190).

Reinke asks some good questions, including: “Do my smartphone behaviors move me toward God or away from him? …Do my smartphone behaviors edify me and others, or do they build nothing of lasting value?” (194). I’m sure we could all find areas where we could improve our words and actions to better love God and our neighbors.

“I am not my own. I am owned by my Lord. I have been bought with a price, which means I must glorify Christ with my thumbs, my ears, my eyes, and my time… I do not have ‘time to kill’—I have time to redeem” (180).

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil” (Eph. 5:15-16).

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© 2021 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture are ESV. Image courtesy of Amazon. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Watch Out!

I can’t help but write what’s on my mind, and at the moment that the problem of anger. A few miles away a teen shot and killed another teen at school last week. I recently thought I might have to break up a fight between two women in the Walmart checkout line. I’ve gotten to where I hate to drive, because either I’m angering other drivers or they are angering me. Anger is not just a problem in the world but in the church too. People say or do things that cause conflict, perhaps intentionally, but often unintentionally—failing to talk to someone, assuming too much, pushing a person out of a job, etc. The color of the carpet, the music, and budget allocations have been known to cause church splits. James wrote,

“What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions” (James 4:1-3 ESV).

I had always read James 4:2-3 as instruction on prayer, but nowhere does James say that. Rather, might he be saying that if you would talk to the other person you would find no reason to covet and quarrel? So many conflicts could be avoided simply by communicating better. Most of us probably don’t murder or fight, but we’re experts at snide remarks and angry thoughts. Jesus said that “everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the fire of hell” (Matthew 5:22). I doubt that anyone is innocent under those criteria.

The Apostle Paul wrote,

“Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these... Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another” (Galatians 5:19-21a, 26).

I find it interesting that his list can almost be divided into two categories: lust and anger. I suspect that most pastors would also identify those as the two biggest areas of sin in their churches. The Apostle John summarized it this way, “For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from that Father but is from the world” (1 John 2:16).

Anger doesn’t occur in a vacuum. There is always some underlying cause, and often there are related emotional triggers—pride or shame, fear, jealousy, desire, prejudice, or some combination of those. David Powlison said “sinful anger is an expression of your playing God according to James 4:12. Who are you if you judge your brother? Who are you if you speak evil of him? Well, you are God. You are acting as though you are lawgiver and judge.” We believe we are god of something, so we balk at being dethroned.

Thinking of a recent situation that angered me, I realize it was a result of 1) lack of clear communication of purpose and expectations, and 2) jealousy over losing control of something that I once believed to be my domain (along with some other tangential issues). Some explanation helped, but more necessary is an ongoing surrender of my rights to rule or to judge others who do things differently. I know the world would be better if everyone would just do things my way! God must say the same thing every day about the choices that we make and the ways we try to take over His throne. One day the King will come and remind us all Who is really in charge.

“Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom... But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace” (James 3:13, 17-18).

© 2018 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com. The opinions stated do not necessarily reflect the views of my church or employer.

Fruitful Growth

A recent issue of Christianity Today included the article “The Science of Sinning Less” which cites various studies on self-control. The author states, “One key recent discovery is that self-control is an exhaustible but buildable resource.” Like a muscle, self-control that is exercised regularly becomes stronger. I’m not sure that’s really a new discovery, but there is truth there. And while that is good to know, it doesn’t address the fact that Scripture talks about self-control not just as self-effort but as a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). That led me on a search for a description of biblical self-control and how it should work. Here are some of the quotes I found:

David Mathis wrote,

“True self-control is a gift from above, produced in and through us by the Holy Spirit. Until we own that it is received from outside ourselves, rather than whipped up from within, the effort we give to control our own selves will redound to our praise, rather than God’s… Ultimately, our controlling ourselves is about being controlled by Christ. When ‘the love of Christ controls us’ (2 Corinthians 5:14), when we embrace the truth that he is our sovereign, and God has ‘left nothing outside his control’ (Hebrews 2:8), we can bask in the freedom that we need not muster our own strength to exercise self-control, but we can find strength in the strength of another.”

John Piper put it this way:

“The key to a transformed mind is the steady gaze at the glory of Jesus Christ. For that to happen, we need a double work from the Holy Spirit… We need the Holy Spirit to work from the outside in by putting before us Christ-exalting truth in the gospel, and we need the Holy Spirit to work from the inside out by humbling our hard hearts. Both have to happen.”

One particularly helpful article was written by Ed Welch in The Journal of Biblical Counseling. He wrote:

“[Genuine] self-control… is not the same as relying on yourself and working up the willpower to control yourself. Instead, self-control is a gift of the Holy Spirit, through faith in Jesus Christ. It is a side effect of the fear of the Lord… The real prize is Christ Himself. So, with Jesus in view, we do those things that are important, true, and good, rather than those things that feel urgent but are ungodly… Although our cravings go deep, they are no match for the Spirit of the living God. This, of course, does not mean that the battle is over and we can ‘let go and let God.’ Rather, it means that we are now empowered to engage in the battle. As the Hebrews were promised the land, but had to take it by force, one town at a time, so we are promised the gift of self-control, yet we also must take it by force. Only the grace of God takes self-control out of the realm of hopeless self-reformation into that of great confidence that we can be transformed people.”

For practical application, Welch suggests:

“[The] desire for self-control must be accompanied by a plan… It is one thing to make a resolution; it is something completely different to repent diligently, seek counsel, and, in concert with others, develop a plan that is concrete and Christ-centered. The heart of any plan, of course, must be Jesus Christ. Self-control is like any other feature of wisdom in that it is learned by contemplating a person… Rather than give us twelve steps on which to rely, he gives us a Person to know. As Jesus is known and exalted among us, you will notice that self-control becomes more obvious. The double cure for sin is the foundation for all change. That is, in the gospel, we have been released from both the condemnation and the power of sin.”

As we contemplate Jesus Christ, His soon return, and the surpassing worth of knowing Him, may we find His fruit steadily increasing within our lives.

“For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for Himself a people for His own possession who are zealous for good works” (Titus 2:11-14 ESV).

© 2017 Dawn Rutan. Unless otherwise indicated all images are copyright free from pixabay.com.

Thinking About Thoughts

“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer” (Psalm 19:14 ESV). I have to confess that this can be a challenging verse for me. Not so much the first part, because I generally keep my mouth shut, but the meditation of my heart can be problematic. I was reading a book recently that mentioned the loss of self-control that occurs in some Alzheimer’s patients, and they start saying whatever comes to mind. It was kind of a wake-up call since I could easily be in that same boat in the future. And if I want my words then to reflect a pure heart, I better work on cleaning up my thoughts now.

It’s a tricky area. Everyone has thoughts that pop up seemingly out of nowhere. We may not be able to stop that from happening, but we can certainly decide whether or not we are going to dwell on them. It’s easy to rationalize that thoughts don’t really matter because they aren’t hurting anyone. But Jesus said that lustful thoughts are as sinful as lustful acts, and angry thoughts are as sinful as murder (Matthew 5:21-30). Philippians 4:8 tells us the kind of things we should think about: true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, praiseworthy. But if you’re like me the first thought is: “There aren’t that many good things to think about in this world!” Then the second thought is: “I have to figure out what to do about this problem I’m facing.”

I think there are ways to mull over a problem prayerfully, seeking God’s wisdom, but I also know how quickly such thoughts can degenerate into a rehearsal of everything that has gone wrong and anxiety about what else could go wrong. It requires a vigilance and consciousness of the direction your mind is heading.

This past weekend at our regional women’s retreat, I was thinking about this as I revisited Psalm 139. I realized that although I may not physically “make my bed in Sheol” or “dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,” my mind can still take me places that are better left unvisited. But even there, God is with me and desires to lead me out. I rewrote Psalm 139 for myself from that perspective, though I can’t share it publicly because it is too personal.

Though I haven’t yet mastered “taking every thought captive” when my mind is wandering down the wrong paths, I do know that it requires ongoing prayer. The first part of the prayer is “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!” (Psalm 139:23-24). Another key piece is found in verse 17, “How precious to me are Your thoughts, O God!” I pray that God will make that true more and more frequently as time goes by. I want to be captivated by God’s thoughts and God’s Word, but sometimes I’m just not. Sometimes I want distraction and an escape from reality. I don’t want to have to work on self-control, and it would be nice if our brains came with a remote control that could delete channels from the menu. But that’s not how God made us. He made us to learn and grow one choice at a time. As Candy Hall mentioned at our retreat, He cares about each step we take and He celebrates each milestone of spiritual growth. I may not be where I want to be or where I think I should be, but I am moving in the right direction by His grace.

“The Lord knows the thoughts of man, that they are but a breath. Blessed is the man whom You discipline, O Lord, and whom You teach out of Your law” (Psalm 94:11-12).