- “You may be insecure, inadequate, mistaken, or potbellied. Death, panic, depression, and disillusionment may be near you. But you are not just that. You are accepted. Never confuse your perception of yourself with the mystery that you really are accepted.” (25)
- “To believe deeply, as Jesus did, that God is present and at work in human life is to understand that I am a beloved child of this father and hence, free to trust… To trust Abba, both in prayer and life, is to stand in childlike openness before a mystery of gracious love and acceptance.” (74)
- “How difficult it is to be honest, to accept that I am unacceptable, to renounce self-justification, to give up the pretense that my prayers, spiritual insight, tithing, and successes in ministry have made me pleasing to God! No antecedent beauty enamors me in his eyes. I am lovable only because he loves me.” (83)
- “We should be astonished at the goodness of God, stunned that he should bother to call us by name, our mouths wide open at his love, bewildered that at this very moment we are standing on holy ground.” (102)
I could go on for pages with quotes. But to get back to my
imaginary conversation with Brennan—after the introductions (“Hi, I’m Dawn. I’m
a great sinner loved by a greater Savior.”), the question that comes to mind
is, “How can we forget? How is it that we can encounter God and then forget
about His grace?” I’m sure I’m not the only one and probably not even in the
minority. Somehow we get sidetracked and forget that God loved us long before
we did anything for Him. We start trying to earn the love that He has freely
bestowed on us. As I was rereading The Ragamuffin
Gospel today, I found Brennan’s response:
“At some point in each of our lives, we were deeply touched
by a profound encounter with Jesus Christ… We were deeply moved for a few
hours, days, or weeks, and eventually returned to the routine occupations of
our daily existence… Slowly we got caught up in the demands of ministry or
career and the distractions our busy world offers. We began to treat Jesus like
the old friend from Brooklyn whom we dearly
loved in years past but have gradually lost track of… It is possible we may
never love anyone as much as we loved him, but even the memory has grown dim…
Just as the failure to be attentive dissolves confidence and communion in a
human relationship, so inattention to the Holy unravels the fabric of the
divine relationship… We settle in and settle down to lives of comfortable piety
and well-fed virtue. We grow complacent and lead practical lives. Our feeble
attempts at prayer are filled with stilted phrases addressed to an impassive
deity. Even times of worship become trivialized… The forgiveness of God is
gratuitous liberation from guilt. Paradoxically, the conviction of personal
sinfulness becomes the occasion of encounter with the merciful love of the
redeeming God… In his brokenness, the repentant prodigal knew an intimacy with
the father that his sinless, self-righteous brother would never know.”
(185-188)
What I hear Brennan saying to me and to all of us is this—it
doesn’t matter how you forgot, or how far away you wandered. What’s important
is that when you do remember, you go running back to the arms of the Father. He
has been watching and waiting for you, and He keeps sending you little
reminders of His love until you do remember. We have this misguided belief that
the Christian life is a constant upward spiral toward perfection, conveniently
forgetting that even the disciples kept falling off the path even while they
had God incarnate walking beside them! One thing I will often remember (when
I’m not busy forgetting) is God’s voice speaking through Brennan saying, “I
expect more failure from you than you expect from yourself.”
So in his own words, “On the last day when Jesus calls me by
name, ‘Come, Brennan, blessed of my Father,’ it will not be because Abba is
just, but because his name is mercy.” Lord,
thank You for blessing us with a ragamuffin to remind us of Your amazing love
and grace!