Unresolved and Resolved

First, a side note—while it's true that my writing can sound a bit like preaching, the fact is I'm preaching to myself first and foremost. I just hope that others may also benefit from what I need to learn.

I've mentioned before that I don't make New Year's resolutions. It isn't that I don't have things I'd like to change, but I've been disappointed by the futility of trying to discipline the flesh apart from the intervening work of God. Jesus didn't come to reform us in the flesh, but to transform us into new creations. Having said that, I realize that we have to spend a lifetime in this fallen, fleshly body before we get to enjoy the full benefits of the new creation. And while we’re here we’d like to make the best of it. So here are Scriptures things I’ve been thinking about that have helped me to reframe my thoughts about resolutions. While I’m focusing on sinful actions, the same principles apply to anything that is unwise or unhealthy.

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately corrupt; who can understand it?” (Jer. 17:9).  “For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, fornication, theft, false witness, slander” (Matt. 15:19). Our lives are basically controlled by our mind/heart, and everything we do, both good and bad, starts with our thought processes. A sex addict doesn’t suddenly find himself in a hotel room with a strange woman and not remember how he got there. A woman on a diet doesn’t eat a pint of ice cream and not remember picking up the carton. Every wrong action begins with a first thought, a second glance, or a few steps on the familiar path.

“Put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh to gratify its desires” (Rom. 13:14). Just as wrong actions initiate from our thoughts, the solution also has to start in our thoughts. It’s easy to think, “I can handle that little temptation without giving in.” We’re wrong more often than not. Resisting temptation and changing habits may require some significant changes in our routines—avoiding certain places or situations that tend to trip us up, finding people to keep us accountable, and fixing our attention on things that will lift us up instead of pulling us down. “Whatever is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, gracious, excellent, worthy of praise—think about these things” (Phil. 4:8).

I am reminded of a time many years ago when I was frustrated and fed up with a lot of things. I decided in my mind that I was going to go buy some alcohol as a way to cope with the issues. (I’m not saying that drinking is necessarily bad, but my motives were certainly wrong.) So I went to a grocery store I didn’t normally frequent, to try to remain anonymous. As I was scanning the aisles, who should I run into but someone from church. That scuttled my plans pretty quickly!

Sometimes God intervenes when we plan to sin, but sometimes He lets us sin and then face the consequences. “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with the temptation will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it” (1 Cor. 10:13). We don’t always want to look for the way out, but we need to learn to do so if we are really going to change.

“Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewal of your mind…” (Rom. 12:2a). Personally, I know that I need to be more intent upon filling my mind and my life with good things so that I’m not consumed with the bad things. I want and need to spend more time in Scripture and in conversation with God. Writing is one way for me to focus on Scripture and apply it to my life, and journaling helps me to pray coherently and not drift off into random thoughts (or to sleep!). So while I’m not making specific resolutions, I am taking steps that will initiate change in my life and by God’s grace I hope to continue on this path.

Un-Merry Christmas

The more pop Christmas music I hear (and it’s unavoidable), the more I realize how disconnected most of it is from real life. “Tis the season to be jolly;” “Have a holly, jolly Christmas, it’s the best time of the year;” “There’s no place like home for the holidays;” and “Have yourself a merry little Christmas, let your heart be light, from now on our troubles will be out of sight.”

Let’s get real! A lot of us aren’t going to have a jolly Christmas for various reasons—depression, death, national tragedies, unemployment, terminal illness, divorce, family discord, etc. Even saying “Merry Christmas” is a bit of a stretch, though that is somewhat better than “Happy Holidays.” If you don’t know what someone is going through, don’t tell them how to feel about this time of year! Many folks are just biding their time until the shopping frenzy dies down and life can get back to a regular routine. (I purposely did not say “normal routine” because, as Patsy Clairmont said, “Normal is just a setting on your dryer.”) Of the secular songs, my favorite is “If We Make It Through December.”

I can accept most of the more Christian Christmas carols (except for Little Drummer Boy). At least they have some link to our faith in a Savior born in Bethlehem. As some have pointed out, the first Christmas wasn’t all that merry either—registering for taxation, a stable for a delivery room, babies and toddlers killed by a paranoid king… There’s nothing that would make me want to live in that era, not even for a chance to see Jesus in the flesh.

Jesus told the disciples, “I tell you the truth, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy” (John 16:20). As we are getting closer to the Second Coming, and we may hope these are the end times, there will be increased mourning, strife, and hardship. Things are going to get worse, not better. Jesus continued by saying, “I have told you these things so that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). So even though this season may not be filled with happiness, you can still have peace in Christ, hope for eternity, and joy in knowing you’re not alone.

As I shared on Facebook, here are a few of the true gifts that are available in Christ and they cannot be taken away from us:
Joy unspeakable - 1 Pet. 1:8
Grace unending - 2 Cor. 4:15
Love unfathomable - Eph. 3:19
Peace incomprehensible - Phil. 4:7
Wisdom unsearchable - Rom. 11:33
Power incomparable - Eph. 1:19
Patience immeasurable - Rom. 2:4

May your Christmas be blessed with the knowledge of our Savior’s love!

Abundant Life

“I have come that they may have life, and have it abundantly” (John 10:10b).
 

What is this full, abundant life? I’m not sure I have it all figured out yet, but here are a few thoughts. The word used here is the same root word used in Matthew 14:20 and 15:37 referring to the abundant leftovers from feeding the 5000 and the 4000. It is also used in Romans 5:15 referring to the grace of God “super-abounding” through Jesus. It is more than enough, overflowing, extraordinary, profuse, and superfluous.

 

The context of John 10:10 is Jesus’ teaching that He is the Good Shepherd. He knows His sheep and they know Him and follow Him; He lays down His life for the sheep; He protects His sheep and cares for them. He is not simply a caretaker, but the owner and master of the sheep. He has a vested interest in the flock. Psalm 23 is a beautiful picture of our relationship with the Shepherd.

 

I should note that some have used John 10:10 as a basis for their “health & wealth” doctrine, claiming that God wants to give us abundant physical blessings. I won’t take the time to refute that here as many learned men have already tackled that subject. There are plenty of Scriptures that could be cited against that teaching.

 

So what is this abundance? Second Peter 1:3 says, “His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness.” Ephesians 1:3 puts it this way, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.” Paul goes on to list some of those blessings in the next several verses: chosen, adopted, grace, redemption, forgiveness, wisdom and understanding...

 

We have the Creator and Lord of the Universe as our Father— we are heirs together with Christ. “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights” (James 1:17). This page lists just a few of the promises we can claim in Christ:
http://ficm.org/index.php?command=textwhoamiinchrist

 

If we believed all that the Bible says is true about us, perhaps we would come closer to experiencing this abundance in our daily life. But the fact is that our life on earth is marred by sin—both our own and others. The creation itself is damaged by the effects of sin. We live in bodies subject to disease and death. Governments, societies, and churches are full of flawed people with limited understanding. So this life often seems far from abundant. In 2 Corinthians 1:4-5 Paul writes that God “consoles us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to console those who are in any affliction with the consolation with which we ourselves are consoled by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are abundant for us, so also our consolation is abundant through Christ.” The sufferings of this age are tempered with the grace of God, and are used not only for our growth but for the growth of others.

 

Abundant life overflows to others. “Out of the believer’s heart shall flow rivers of living water” (John 7:38). We reflect God’s light and life to those around (Phil. 2:15). We are conduits of God’s grace.

 

A final thought comes from Matthew 28:20, “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” No matter what we go through, the good, the bad and the ugly, Jesus is with us. We don’t have to ask Him to show up or plead for His attention. He is there whether we acknowledge Him or not. And not only is He present, He knows from personal experience what it is like to suffer in this life (Heb. 2:14-18), and He “knows what you need before you ask Him” (Matt. 6:8). When life is hard and we feel like we’re just barely getting by, we can take comfort in knowing that God knows our needs, hears our prayers, and is always present. The abundant life doesn’t depend on our feelings—it is already ours in Christ. May we all be encouraged by this truth!

 

 

Thoughts on Discipleship

The following thoughts are based on recent discussions at church, books I’ve read, as well as my personal experience. I don’t claim to be any kind of authority on the subject of discipleship, so I’ll just say these are my own opinions and should be run through the filter of Scripture for validation. These are in no particular order.

Small Group Discipleship

There seems to be a tendency in certain groups or authors to imply that discipleship is necessarily one-on-one. While there are instances where that is the case, I don’t think that is definitive. Jesus spent most of his time with a small group of twelve. Certainly He was closer to some than others, but there are few places in the Gospels where He speaks just to one person, and even then they appear to be single conversations, not ongoing relationships. The Apostle Paul may have spent more time with individuals such as Timothy, but most of his teaching letters are to groups of believers. So small group Bible studies, Sunday school classes, youth groups, and so on can certainly be settings for discipleship to take place.

This is encouraging to me when I start feeling like I’m not doing everything I should because I don’t currently have a one-on-one relationship in which I am intentionally discipling someone. As I participate in some groups there are still opportunities for discipleship to take place, and I don’t have to chastise myself for my perceived failures.

A Two-Way Street

From my own experiences I’ve learned that discipleship is not necessarily one-way either. As we love one another, encourage one another, and spur one another, that is often a reciprocal relationship. So as I interact with other believers, I don’t have to act like I’m the teacher and they are the student or vice versa. We can all learn from one another. I think perhaps these types of relationships are the most enjoyable—walking the road together and discussing what we see and what we can learn from it.

Since my job is in a Christian organization and my outside activities are lately all church related, I wonder how I’m supposed to make time to build relationships with non-believers for the purpose of discipling them. This takes some of the pressure off with the realization that the majority of discipleship takes place after conversion. And we all have different seasons in life when our community activities and relationships will change.

I signed up for a class in discipleship when I was in graduate school, and in the first session the instructor said, “By next class you each need to go out and find a non-believer and you’re going to disciple them this semester.” I immediately went to the registrar and dropped the class. That kind of pressure was way too much for that setting. Some instruction in discipleship was needed before laying that burden on us. (I’ve often wondered if others dropped the class as well.)

Relational

Some authors suggest, if not state outright, that discipleship needs to be a prescribed program of Bible study, reading books, and scheduled meetings. That idea really frustrates me. Outside of seminary, there are few times and places where you can follow a set curriculum and schedule.

My own experience in being discipled through college and graduate school was much more relaxed and almost entirely related to what was going on in my life at the time. It was all about a relationship with one another and with God. There were some times when we shared books, and we frequently discussed Scripture, but it was by no means a regimented plan. As I said earlier, it was walking through life together as friends, not as teacher instructing student.

God’s Work

Ultimately, spiritual growth is God’s work, not ours. Paul said, “I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase.” Paul and Apollos served to exhort, encourage, and edify many people, but the final result was the work of God. What a relief to know that it doesn’t rest on my shoulders! I’ll do what I can as God leads, but God is the one who will cause growth in my life and in the lives of those I interact with.

As I look back on some relationships, I see that the people have grown far beyond anything I ever imparted to them because they’ve gotten connected with other believers and God has done great things in their lives. But other relationships have stagnated and the people seem to have lost their original zeal for God. I don’t blame myself for that (at least not most of the time). I pray that I planted a seed that at some point will be watered and start growing again. Only God knows what is needed and when that should happen.

We’re Unique

I’ll just close by reaffirming that God has called us each to make disciples as we are going through life, but that process may look different for each of us, and it may look different in the various phases of our lives. It is unfair to try to fit any believer into a particular mold, because God has made us each unique. He works differently in and through each of us depending on the gifts He has given us and the path He has laid out for us. I’m encouraged by these thoughts and I hope they help someone else too.

 

In Everything Give Thanks

Yesterday as I was driving home I was listening to Jan Karon’s book In This Mountain. I’ve read the book a few times before, but needed to be reminded of the sermon Father Tim shares in chapter 19 on 1 Thessalonians 5:18. Here’s a brief excerpt:

“In everything, give thanks… Generally, Christians understand that giving thanks is good and right. Though we don’t do it often enough, it’s easy to have a grateful heart for food and shelter, love and hope, health and peace. But what about the hard stuff, the stuff that darkens your world and wounds you to the quick? … A deeper spiritual truth, I believe, lies in giving thanks… in everything. In loss of all kinds. In illness. In depression. In grief. In failure. And, of course, in health and peace, success and happiness. In everything. There’ll be times when you wonder how you can possibly thank Him for something that turns your life upside down; certainly there will be such times for me. Let us, then, at times like these, give thanks on faith alone… obedient, trusting, hoping, believing… Whether God caused it or permitted it, we can rest assured--there is great good in it.”

So with that reminder yesterday, along with a similar sermon on Psalm 107 this morning, I’m giving thanks for this season of depression in my life, and endeavoring to find the good in it-- strengthening relationships with some friends; new relationships with others in my church family; opportunities to encourage those in similar situations; a job that allows me the time I need for rest and recuperation; reminders of God’s presence in good times and in bad; learning to pray more frequently and faithfully; and most of all a Savior who knows me better than I know myself and loves me more than I can yet imagine.

For a variety of reasons, I’m not inclined to believe that I’ll ever be completely free from depression, one of which is that God has to keep reminding me that I need Him as well as His people. Otherwise I’m quick to become self-reliant. Only when I am weak can His strength show through. I found the following poem by Benjamin Malachi Franklin that my grandmother had copied into the back of a book:

“My life is but a weaving, between my God and me.
I do not choose the colors, He worketh steadily.
Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow; and I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper and I the underside.
Not ‘til the loom is silent, and shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas and reveal the reason why.
The dark threads are as needful in the weaver’s skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver in the pattern He has planned
He knows, He loves, He cares; nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those who leave the choice to Him.”

Why me, Lord?

With a title like that you may be expecting a whining complaint, and I’ll admit I’ve had some days like that (okay, a lot). But today’s thought is a bit different-- “Why do You love me, Lord?” I can understand “God is love,” and “God so loved the world,” but “God loves me”? That is a bit harder to grasp. I am quick to tell myself that there is nothing within me that makes me worthy of God’s love. I certainly can’t earn His love. But I think there are a few things I can latch onto.

1. God created me. Sure, the fallen world has messed up this particular creation quite a bit. But God does love His creations. I can understand a little about the pride and joy of creating something, even if it is not perfect at this moment.

2. God decided in advance that I would be His child. He adopted me in spite of the fact that I am often a poor reflection of my Father. He loves me as His child even though I don’t always act like part of His family.

3. God is working on me, in me, and through me. He is conforming me to the image of Jesus, though this is a lifelong process. He has promised to complete that work. His love is transforming my heart and mind slowly but surely. And He has arranged good works for me to do, even though I’m not always sure what I am doing or why.

So God loves me because He created me to be His child and is making me into what He deems best for me. But to complicate matters, God loves me just as I am and not as I should be. In this life I will never be quite what I should be, but God will complete the work in the resurrection.

I still don’t quite understand “why me,” but maybe the question should be “why not me?” I’m not all that different from the many other individuals God has chosen and adopted as His children. We’re all far from perfect and not all that lovable. But as St. Augustine said, “In loving me, You made me lovable.”

God’s ways are not mine, and I am not going to figure out His master plan. Somehow I just have to trust that I am part of that plan and He will make it happen. Even though I don’t understand it, I believe: “Yes, Jesus loves me, the Bible tells me so.”

 

Who's In Control Here

There are two things I’ve been thinking about for the past week or so, and it turns out they are related.

The first is the idea of relinquishing all authority, decisions, and control—as if returning to childhood, when someone else had all the responsibility for taking care of my needs. (At least that is one example. I have others I can’t share.) While I was wishing that could be the case, God reminded me, “What do you think I am here for?” He is the one who is in control of all things, so why can’t I let Him do His job? One reason is that I’m not quite sure how to let go of the big stuff, much less the small stuff. Heck, I can’t even let go of jobs that other people can or should be doing. I live by the motto, “If you want it done right, do it yourself.” So what can I do to let God be God? I guess the first, and perhaps biggest thing, is to accept His promises on faith. Of course, that assumes that I know what He has promised through His Word. He says He’ll provide, taking care of everything from clothing the lilies to giving us daily bread. He says He is always there, always aware of what is going on, and will never give us more than we can bear. But most of the time I don’t believe that He cares or will provide, and it seems like it’s up to me to get it done.

The second thought is wondering what the future holds and whether it is worth waiting for. As a child, you can’t wait to get old enough to drive, then to graduate from high school. Then maybe you can’t wait to graduate from college and get out in the “real world.” And then you get a job and find out that it doesn’t fulfill all your expectations either, no matter how many different jobs you try. And for some, marriage and family are goals that you can’t wait to reach, then maybe empty nesting and grandkids. But at some point, at least I think this is true for most people, you start asking, “Is this all there is?” Maybe that’s what a midlife crisis is all about. I’ve been wondering whether I’m just biding my time until either something new happens or the end comes (whether through death or the Second Coming of Jesus). Doesn’t God have something better in mind than for me to do my job, collect my paycheck and go home? So with those thoughts in mind I have tried to make some small changes in my life that might make me at least feel more productive. (In psychology terms, they call this stage Generativity vs. Stagnation.)

Then last night I started reading John Ortberg’s book The Me I Want to Be. And he hits on the same topics. I’m just a couple chapters in, but what I’ve learned from it so far is that there is nothing I can do to make myself better. God made me, He knows me best, and He has plans to use me in ways that I can’t foresee. I can’t fulfill my own expectations, or anyone else’s for that matter. But God can fulfill His expectations to make me who He wants me to be. Ortberg writes, “Languishing is the condition of someone who may be able to function but has lost a sense of hope and meaning.”  And, “To be spiritually alive means to receive power from God to have a positive impact on your world.” (Sorry I don’t have page numbers, but I’m working from the Kindle version.)

I’m still pondering what this all means, and how to get to the point of letting God get on with what He’s already begun in me (Philippians 1:6). I know I can’t do it myself because I’ve tried for years and it has only made me miserable. I’m hoping Ortberg will have a few clues on how to let go. Meanwhile I’m trying to immerse myself in the promises of God and let them saturate my brain and my spirit. I need a bigger bulletin board for all the index cards of Scripture I’m accumulating!