I Delight in You

I’ve been thinking lately about Zephaniah 3:17: “The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with his love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” Have you ever thought about God delighting in you? That’s hard for me to comprehend. Yeah, I know God loves me, but so what? You mean He actually delights in me?! I can’t imagine why. But for whatever reason, God doesn’t just love me, He likes me. And He doesn’t just like me, He delights in me.

J.I. Packer writes in Knowing God, “There is, certainly, great cause for humility in the thought that he sees all the twisted things about me that my fellow humans do not see (and am I glad!), and that he sees more corruption in me than that which I see in myself (which, in all conscience, is enough). There is, however, equally great incentive to worship and love God in the thought that, for some unfathomable reason, he wants me as his friend, and desires to be my friend, and has given his Son to die for me in order to realize this purpose.”

I think that we tend to forget that salvation comes to us because of God’s love and delight. He didn’t just take pity on us poor defenseless creatures, like we might pity the kitten that shows up on our doorstep. God is love, and love can’t be self-contained. His love overflows to the people He created in His image. Larry Crabb writes in Connecting, “Nothing is more fundamental to appreciating the essence of Christian living than to ponder the implications of a central but often neglected truth: We have all been created by an Eternal Community of three fully connected persons. When we’re told that we bear God’s image, we immediately know two things: 1. We were designed to connect with others... 2. Connecting with others depends on using our capacity to relate for the enjoyment and enhancement of someone other than ourselves."

I really enjoyed reading Connecting. It struck a chord in me that reminded me that we not only need to experience God’s delight in us, but we need relationships with people who delight in us as well. The church should be a place where that happens regularly, and yet it often doesn’t. Far too many people come to church once a week (or more), but fail to have any kind of meaningful relationships that reach outside the walls of that building. I desire to have at least a few relationships with people who know me and who delight in me for who I am, not for what I do. That kind of intimacy is possible because of the life of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit in us. Paul wrote, “May the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all, as we do for you” (1 Thess. 3:12). I haven’t seen that kind of abundant love in many churches, and perhaps just small pockets in many other churches.

If the local assembly of the Body of Christ were fully united and working together in the abundant love of Christ, I’m sure there would be no problem attracting new believers and new members. As I’ve shared with a couple people, true community has a healing power that is largely untapped as we settle for superficial imitations most of the time. Certain people have an ability to touch lives more deeply because they willingly invest themselves in the people around them. My own experience has made this clearer to me lately, and I would love to see that multiplied in other lives.

One of the illustrations in Connecting keeps coming back to me. Brennan Manning would regularly meet with an older man, and each time they got spotted each other at their meeting place, the man would jump up and down with delight saying, “There’s Brennan!” Later, Brennan gave the same kind of reception to Larry Crabb, and it filled him with joy. Are there those people who delight in us and jump up and down (either literally or figuratively) when they see us? Some parents are welcomed home each day by the delight of their young children. But are there others who know us intimately and love us anyway? Have we ever taken the risk of letting someone get that close to begin with?

I’m beginning to experience the truth of 1 John 4:18, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear…” Even imperfect love can begin to break down the walls of fear, and love seems to expand to overflow whatever space it’s given. At little love goes a long way. I keep thinking of Lilo & Stitch. Experiment 626, who was created to destroy everything he sees, is adopted, named Stitch, loved in spite of his aggressive nature, and he begins to transform and reform. And by the end of the movie he realizes he has a family that loves him and he doesn’t want to leave. While it’s a cute kids’ story, I wonder whether we aren’t all longing for that kind of love: a love that fights for us even when we aren’t worth fighting for, and a family that sticks together even when some members are broken, wounded, and weak.

So I’ll leave you with two thoughts today: 1) God delights in you and me, no matter how unfathomable that may seem, and 2) because of the transforming power of God’s love we can love and delight in one another.

“Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” -Psalm 37:4

If I Were There

If I were there that Sunday,

Would I have noticed His entry?
Would I have laid down my cloak
And cheered the coming King?
Or would I have stood back
Wondering what all the fuss was about?

 

If I were there in the Upper Room,
Would I have let Him wash my feet?
Would I have proclaimed my undying devotion?
Would I have asked, “Is it I?”
Or would I have slipped out to betray Him?

If I were there in the courtyard,
Would I have denied my Lord?
Would I have hidden in the shadows?
Or would I have cheered the accusers
And spat in His face?
Would I have asked for Barabbas instead?

If I were there on the hillside,
Would I have mocked Him?
Would I have wept with His mother?
Would the darkness have startled me
Into realizing this was an innocent man?
Would I have helped prepare His body
And laid Him in my tomb?

If I were there that morning,
Would I have gone to the tomb?
Would I have seen the angels?
Would I have run to share the news?
Would I have believed the report of others?
Or would I still be doubting?

Lord, without seeing, I believe
Without hearing, I trust Your Word
By faith I accept Your love,
And wait in hope for Your return!

Broken Wells

I’m always reading at least two books at the same time. Several times recently I’ve read a chapter in one book, switched to another book and read a chapter that echoes the other book. This week that happened with The God of All Comfort by Hannah Whitall Smith and Inside Out by Larry Crabb. Both authors referred to Jeremiah 2:13, “My people have committed two evils: they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.” In this passage the people of God have walked away from the true source of water and life, and have tried their own methods of finding satisfaction and fulfillment.

The focus in Crabb’s book is that we are inclined to work from the outside in—we work to make our external circumstances more comfortable, then we build relationships, and we hope to find satisfaction now and for the future. What we should be doing is building our relationship with God, then building godly relationships with others, and we’ll find joy regardless of our circumstances. A big part of the problem, as Crabb explains it, is that we demand that people fulfill needs that only God can fill, and we demand that God fulfill our needs in a way that won’t happen in this lifetime. So we live with constant disappointment that we aren’t getting what we think we need. While Crabb’s theory is pretty accurate, it’s also discouraging to be told, “Get over yourself and live with the disappointment.” (Interestingly, his later book Connecting takes a whole new direction with the joy of living in community with one another. I’ll probably include some of that in a later blog.)

I think it can be valuable to consider how we might be walking past God’s wellspring of life and digging our own wells. It may be outright sin, which we either indulge in or try to control through behavior modification. It may be pain, depression and anxiety, which we may medicate, seek counseling, or try to muddle through. It may be relationships, work, church, or any number of things. We want to feel good and enjoy life, but sometimes things just don’t work out that way. So what do we do when things go wrong? Do we try everything in our power to “fix” it, or do we trust that God is in control and He knows what He’s doing? Not that we shouldn’t seek help, but sometimes we need to let God work things out in His own way. For myself, I’ve discovered that years of seeing doctors and trying innumerable medications have been less beneficial than finding faith, hope, and love in community.

Whitall Smith says this, “The church of Christ abounds with people who are ‘discouraged because of the way.’ Either inwardly or outwardly, and oftentimes both, things look all wrong, and there seems no hope of escape. Their souls faint within them, and their religious lives are full of discomfort and misery. There is nothing that so paralyzes effort as discouragement, and nothing that more continually and successfully invites defeat. The secret of failure or success in any matter lies far more in the soul’s interior attitude than in any other cause or causes.”

Both Crabb and Whitall Smith make the point that an attitude of grumbling or complaining comes from blaming God for the things He has allowed to come into our lives. We think that we deserve better treatment from God, or else we believe that He is not in control, so we feel justified in griping when things don’t go our way. Instead, we are to believe His sovereignty, trust His goodness, and give thanks. If nothing else, we can be thankful that He is with us in all circumstances and He loves us more than we can imagine. We’re like children who eat meal after meal without comment so long as it is something we like. But when a distasteful food comes along everybody in the house hears our complaint. That’s usually when we get reminded of the starving children in Africa. Even ungodly parents are aware that a little dose of perspective is needed occasionally, yet we forget that in our dealings with God.

I have to confess that as I’ve read Hannah Whitall Smith’s writings in The God of All Comfort and The Christian’s Secret of a Happy Life, sometimes I’ve been frustrated with her blanket statements—just believe, don’t doubt, have faith, give thanks, don’t complain, pray! Those are much easier said than done when we face difficulties in life. But I think it probably does get easier with practice. At times my prayers have been, “Lord, I believe—help my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24); or “Increase my faith!” (Luke 17:5). I’m certain that God honors those prayers.

For today I’ll remind myself with Psalm 100 that God is the good, loving Creator and Shepherd who is worthy of thanks and praise:

1 Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth!
2 Serve the Lord with gladness!
Come into His presence with singing!
3 Know that the Lord, He is God!
It is He who made us, and we are His;
we are His people, and the sheep of His pasture.
4 Enter His gates with thanksgiving,
and His courts with praise!
Give thanks to Him; bless His name!
5 For the Lord is good;
His steadfast love endures forever,
and His faithfulness to all generations.

Faithful Hope

I recently read The Healing Path by Dan Allender. He invites us to look at our lives through the lenses of faith, hope and love. The difficulty we all face is that humans are imperfect. Faith in people will eventually result in betrayal by someone. It may be in some small way such as gossip, or something much larger like adultery or abuse. Repeated experiences of betrayal can cause us to lose hope and to feel powerless. When the vulnerability of love brings wounds, we can become ambivalent about the desire to love again. Unfortunately, that is all part of living in a fallen world in relationship with fallen people.

Our experiences with people can color our understanding of God. He is the only perfect being, and is the perfect source of faith, hope and love. But life can lead us to doubt His goodness and power, wonder whether He truly loves us, and question whether there is any hope for the future to be any different. Hannah Whitall Smith writes in The God of All Comfort, “In this matter of comfort it is exactly as it is in every other experience in the religious life. God says, ‘Believe, and then you can feel.’ We say, ‘Feel, and then we can believe.’ ...If we want to be comforted, we must make up our minds to believe every single solitary word of comfort God has ever spoken.” It may seem like a trite Sunday-school answer—just believe because the Bible tells me so. But if we have no foundation in Scripture, we have nowhere we can safely place our trust, and so faith, hope and love are foolish indeed. If God is not trustworthy, then no one is, and we dare not let anyone close enough to hurt us. Smith continues, “A trustworthy person commands trust; not in the sense of ordering people to trust him, but by irresistibly winning their trust by his trustworthiness.”

Allender puts it this way, “Life without faith becomes anemic and predictable, never sufficiently stirring to compel us to risk for the future.” If we choose to risk being wounded again, we will often be surprised by love and joy in relationship with God and others. But if we choose to live the “safe” life of self-protection, we lose out on the blessings, and we’ll still end up getting hurt anyway.

Romans 15:8-13 reminds us that God is true and trustworthy based on everything we read in Scripture. The God of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, Noah, David, Isaiah, John, and Paul is the same God we have with us today. And in Him we can have hope—hope for salvation and sanctification, hope for authentic love, hope for fellowship and relationship with one another, and hope for His return. “Hope makes us victors who succeed because we live for nothing more or less than His coming. Hope is not in a change of circumstances, but in the confidence that our character will change as we live for His coming. Hope compels us to live for the future by pouring ourselves out as offerings to God in our relationships with other” (Allender). In Christ our faith, hope and love are secure, and in that security we can risk extending love to others even when logic tells us otherwise.

Through faith in God we can find hope, joy, peace, goodness, kindness, and all the other Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). I came to the realization (again) that if we as believers have been grafted into the Vine, then the Spirit will cause that fruit to grow without us striving and fretting over it. We can’t create the fruit on our own. It is as we depend on the Vine for nourishment that the fruit will bud and flourish. We may not even be conscious of its development as we don’t “feel” like anything is happening. But we can trust that God is at work in us, changing us to be more conformed to His image, using us for His purposes, and growing His fruit in our lives.

“And now abide faith, hope and love, these three; but the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13).

Enlightenment

I’ve been doing a lot of reading in recent weeks about our identity in Christ and the lies we tend to believe instead. As I was thinking about it, I realized that subtle lies can slip into our thinking over time without being noticed right away. In my own case, I started learning about who I am in Christ when I was in college. It was a relief to know that I was loved and accepted by God and it didn’t depend on my performance or lack thereof. But I have to say that I’m not sure I ever really believed all that to be true. Yes, it sounds good, but surely God expects me to be working toward perfection anyway? I’ve always been a perfectionist, and even if God doesn’t expect that from me, I expect it from myself. So are my standards higher than God’s? There’s a scary thought.

I discovered that another lie had snuck in as well. My beliefs slowly migrated—I am complete in Christ, therefore my approval doesn’t come from other people, therefore I don’t need other people. It started out true but ended upside down. That shift wasn’t intentional by any means, though it was driven by a lot of other factors I can’t go into. It’s funny how pride can manifest both as self-promotion and self-protection depending on the circumstances.

One book that I should probably reread every few years is The Search for Significance, by Robert McGee. He begins by saying: “[If] we are honest with ourselves, from time to time, we find the light being turned on in our world, and we are amazed (and sometimes embarrassed) at what we see. It isn’t that we don’t know that certain things are not right. We just don’t realize how destructive these things are until the light comes on… It is difficult—if not impossible—to turn on the light of objectivity by ourselves. We need guidance from the Holy Spirit and usually the honesty, love, and encouragement of at least one other person who is willing to help us…” (2-3).

The past few months have turned on the light in my life, and I am convinced that God allows us to go through difficult seasons in order to help us realize we can’t keep walking in the dark. It’s been humbling to suddenly see the darkness for what it is, but even more humbling to look back over the past couple decades and see how quickly the light got turned out after prior “enlightenments.” It doesn’t take long to get distracted by sin, the world’s definition of life, and busyness (even ministry).
In thinking about the sermon on Hebrews 12:1-2, I’m thankful that our “cloud of witnesses” doesn’t just include those who have gone before us, but also those who are walking alongside us even now. It’s easier (at least for me) to overlook the lives of the men and women in the Bible than to try to ignore the people I see daily or weekly who want to know “How are you really doing?” It is encouraging to know that others have dealt with or are currently dealing with the same struggles and are finding victory in Christ. As McGee writes, “God’s love, expressed through His people and woven into our lives by His Spirit and His Word, can, over a period of time, bring healing even to our deepest wounds and instill within us an appropriate sense of self-worth” (7).

So when it comes to the question of what we need to lay aside in order to run the race, several things come to mind for me as well as for most of the people I know: pride (including self-sufficiency, self-preservation, self-promotion), control, perfectionism, seeking approval, apathy, avoidance, anger, blaming myself or others, false guilt… The list of destructive thoughts, emotions, and behaviors could go on and on. We’ve all got them, whether we’ve let the light shine on them or not.

Two books I’ve read recently (McGee and also Redemption by Mike Wilkerson) have made the point that sin is trying to fulfill real needs in wrong ways. These are things we need to lay aside, but part of that process will require figuring out what the real needs are (love, acceptance, forgiveness, etc.) and understanding how God meets those needs in legitimate ways. Without that, any effort to lay aside the sin is just going to leave us empty and searching for something to fill that spot. Unfortunately, there doesn’t seem to be any quick fix for our learned beliefs and behaviors. It took a long time to internalize the lies, and now may take just as long to internalize the truth. I’ll let you know when I’ve arrived, because the race is still in progress! As many have reminded us—if you’re running the race and you fall or get off course, you don’t go back to the starting line. You just get up, turn back toward the finish line, and keep running.

Christ Only

Since I’ve been busy this week and haven’t done much writing, I thought I’d share an extended quote that I read last night from The Christian’s Secret of a Happy Life by Hannah Whitall Smith (1875). This doesn’t need any explanation, and it's something I needed to be reminded of.

“You are a child of God, and long to please Him. You love your divine Master, and are sick and weary of the sin that grieves Him. You long to be delivered from its power. Everything you have hitherto tried has failed to deliver you: and now, in your despair, you are asking if it can indeed be, as these happy people say, that Jesus is able and willing to deliver you. Surely you must know in your very soul that He is—that to save you out of the hand of all your enemies is, in fact, just the very thing He came to do. Then trust Him. Commit your case to Him in an absolute unreserve, and believe that He undertakes it; and at once, knowing what He is and what He has said, claim that He does even now save you. Just as you believed at first that He delivered you from the guilt of sin because He said it, so now believe that He delivers you from the power of sin because He says it. Let your faith now lay hold of a new power in Christ. You have trusted Him as your dying Saviour; now trust Him as your living Saviour. Just as much as He came to deliver you from future punishment did He also come to deliver you from present bondage. Just as truly as He came to bear your stripes for you has He come to live your life for you. You are as utterly powerless in the one case as in the other. You could as easily have got yourself rid of your own sins, as you could now accomplish for yourself practical righteousness. Christ, and Christ only, must do both for you; and your part in both cases is simply to give the thing to Him to do, and then believe that He does it..." (54-55)

“Lord Jesus, I believe that thou art able and willing to deliver me from all the care and unrest and bondage of my Christian life. I believe thou didst die to set me free, not only in the future, but now and here. I believe thou art stronger than sin, and that thou canst keep me, even me, in my extreme of weakness, from falling into its snares or yielding obedience to its commands. And, Lord, I am going to trust thee to keep me. I have tried keeping myself, and have failed, and failed most grievously. I am absolutely helpless. So now I will trust thee. I give myself to thee. I keep back no reserves. Body, soul, and spirit, I present myself to thee as a piece of clay, to be fashioned into anything thy love and thy wisdom shall choose. And now I am thine. I believe thou dost accept that which I present to thee; I believe that this poor, weak, foolish heart has been taken possession of by thee, and that thou hast even at this very moment begun to work in me to will and to do of thy good pleasure. I trust thee utterly, and I trust thee now.” (55-56)

Amen!

People Who Need People

I’ve been realizing (again) the fact that God created us as social beings. We need people even when we think we don’t. We are made to live in fellowship with one another. The irony is that people are also our greatest source of pain and suffering. People sin against God; people sin against one another; people create cultures of sin. Our natural tendency is to avoid things that can cause us harm. So it’s not surprising that when we have been harmed by people we tend to avoid letting people get close to us. I know this is more common for some people and some circumstances than it is for others. Some of us are more prone to isolationism due to a host of factors.

Think of Hannah in 1 Samuel 1. She was despondent about her barrenness. Her husband basically told her to get over it. In the temple she poured out her heart to God. Then when Eli the priest found out her story, he blessed and encouraged her by joining in her petition to God. It apparently didn’t require a long counseling session, but a few words from someone who cared were enough to lift her spirits. In 1 Samuel 18 we find the story of David’s friendship with Jonathan. That relationship helped to sustain David through difficult times, including threats from Jonathan’s father. Centuries later in the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus was comforted by the presence of Peter, James and John in the ultimate sorrow of His impending death.

There are a few things I think we can learn from these Scriptures and many others. First and foremost, as we were reminded this Sunday from Ephesians 1, we are the Body of Christ. We can be His hands to serve, His arms to hug, His ears to listen, and His eyes to see those around us who need His care. Even though we may not be serving in a formal capacity in the church, we each have other circles of friends, family, and coworkers who need the touch of Christ through us. Whether we’re bringing a meal to a shut-in, listening to a friend who’s going through a tough time, or praying for a coworker, our task is just as important as the Sunday school teacher or board chairman. We shouldn’t discount our service just because it happens out of the public eye.

Secondly, we need to remember that people don’t want to share their pain or difficulties in a way that makes them vulnerable to more pain. Different settings are required for different people. Some may be okay with sharing openly in a Sunday school class, some may prefer a small group, but most people need those one-on-one relationships where they can safely be open and honest. That’s where the Body of Christ comes into play, with each person reaching out to someone else and building caring relationships. The Kingdom of God isn’t just a bunch of churches, but many individuals.

The third lesson is for those of us who are prone to isolation, and that is to seek out someone we can trust and work to build one relationship at a time. It doesn’t happen overnight, and there is risk inherent in any relationship. But the benefits can far outweigh the risks if we keep at it. When you’re hurting, it’s easy to become myopic and not even see the people around us who are willing and able to listen. It isn’t even necessary that someone has all the answers so long as they hear us and want to keep walking the road with us, and that’s what sharing the burden is all about. Even professional counselors don’t have all the answers, though some of them think they do.

I don’t have all the answers either, but I hope that my perspective can encourage those who are like me, and perhaps edify those who are different. The bottom line is that God made us so that we need each other. We can help one another, encourage one another, serve one another, teach one another, exhort one another, and love one another as we continue this adventure called life.